20 million sexless marriages

[Cheyenne]

I don't know how statistics are created exactly but this is an alarming number considering we are suppose to be so much more sexually liberated.
And though the problem lies more with women there are men who are guilty as well.

NEW YORK, Dec. 16 (UPI) -- About 20 million U.S. marriages are believed to
be sexless, according to a new survey.

Among the 4,000 men polled by New York City sexologist and author Bob
Berkowitz and his writer wife, Susan Yager-Berkowitz, 68 percent of men
blame their wives for failing to ignite their passions.

Husbands, among other things, complained "she doesn't seem to enjoy it," the
New York Post reported Sunday.

"I'm game for almost anything," one 30-year-old man responded to the online
survey, "but her idea of adventurous sex is leaving the light on."

In follow-up interviews, men complained their wives would neither perform
certain sex acts nor show enthusiasm in the bedroom.

"For some guys it may mean that she's not doing what they see online, which
is unrealistic," Berkowitz said.

About half of the males surveyed said they were interested in sex, but with
people other than their wife, the newspaper reported.

"If these guys are not having sex with their wives, they're probably having
affairs," Berkowitz said.

© 2007 United Press International
Dec. 16, 2007

[actsnoblemartin]

this is another reason, im not getting married.

[PostmodernProphet]

this is another reason, im not getting married.

I thought it was because "I think men are superior to women".......

[nevadamedic]

I thought it was because "I think men are superior to women".......

If men were truley superior to women they would be flexible enough to get their head between their legs :laugh2:

[Psychoblues]

Don't push your problems off on me, cheyenne.

[actsnoblemartin]

that has nothing to do with this thread or what i said.


I thought it was because "I think men are superior to women".......

[Cheyenne]

Don't push your problems off on me, cheyenne.
Who pulled your string??

[Psychoblues]

You made a remark and I responded.


Who pulled your string??

I am not your Chatty Cathy doll.

[gabosaurus]

If men were truley superior to women they would be flexible enough to get their head between their legs :laugh2:

George Carlin once addressed this issued. He said "If I could reach, I would never leave the house."

[Psychoblues]

George Carlin is a professional Comedian.


George Carlin once addressed this issued. He said "If I could reach, I would never leave the house."

You need practice on your delivery as well as your material selection.

[typomaniac]

The OP sounds like a good case for wife swapping. :laugh2:

[Psychoblues]

Could be.


The OP sounds like a good case for wife swapping. :laugh2:

Make your case.

[gabosaurus]

In sympathy with the sexless marriages, I am trying to take up the slack for as many of them as possible...

[Hugh Lincoln]

"If these guys are not having sex with their wives, they're probably having affairs," Berkowitz said.

And with Internet sites that make that easier, it's probably more frequent than it used to be, I would guess.

[Cheyenne]

And with Internet sites that make that easier, it's probably more frequent than it used to be, I would guess.
You bet'cha. And I'm not referring to the porn sites. The Net allows us to spend time away from our partner and it the company of others to the point of real emotional intimacy. And yes, that's cheating.

[Psychoblues]

Your admission and honesty are duly noted.


You bet'cha. And I'm not referring to the porn sites. The Net allows us to spend time away from our partner and it the company of others to the point of real emotional intimacy. And yes, that's cheating.

Have you considered getting your dirty hands off the keyboard?

[Cheyenne]

Your admission and honesty are duly noted.
Have you considered getting your dirty hands off the keyboard?Since you know not one thing about me, why do you assume this has anything to do with me, personally?
We as human being tend to judge/view others by our own behavior. You're revealing more about yourself than you can imagine.

[Psychoblues]

Here is your quote from the post in question: "You bet'cha. And I'm not referring to the porn sites. The Net allows us to spend time away from our partner and it the company of others to the point of real emotional intimacy. And yes, that's cheating."




Since you know not one thing about me, why do you assume this has anything to do with me, personally?
We as human being tend to judge/view others by our own behavior. You're revealing more about yourself than you can imagine.

You reveal far more on your own than anything I could reveal about you in my simple observations.

[Cheyenne]

Here is your quote from the post in question: "You bet'cha. And I'm not referring to the porn sites. The Net allows us to spend time away from our partner and it the company of others to the point of real emotional intimacy. And yes, that's cheating."
You want to tell me just how this comments reveals anything about me?

I stand by my statement though; when you are placing your attention on someone else, becoming emotionally intimate, you are taking away from your spouse/partner what is rightfully theirs alone.

[Psychoblues]

Copy the post and talk to your doctor.



You want to tell me just how this comments reveals anything about me?

I stand by my statement though; when you are placing your attention on someone else, becoming emotionally intimate, you are taking away from your spouse/partner what is rightfully theirs alone.

You are obviously overly possessive and certainly delusional.

[Cheyenne]

Copy the post and talk to your doctor.
You are obviously overly possessive and certainly delusional.And I now understand why you have the ID you do.

[Psychoblues]

It's only a handle, my lil' Cheyenne maiden.



And I now understand why you have the ID you do.

Seriously, talk to your doc.

[gabosaurus]

You two need to spend less time arguing and more time having sex. :)

[Psychoblues]

I get all the sex I want and need in my own home, gabby. Where're you getting yours?

[actsnoblemartin]

thats something :puke3:

I dont wanna know


I get all the sex I want and need in my own home, gabby. Where're you getting yours?

[Psychoblues]

Then why your inquisitiveness?


thats something :puke3:

I dont wanna know

Ask not and you will receive not.

[actsnoblemartin]

you said, where are you getting yours

eww :coffee:


I get all the sex I want and need in my own home, gabby. Where're you getting yours?

[mrg666]

I get all the sex I want and need in my own home, gabby. Where're you getting yours?

isnt that classed as just a little too much information ?
are you gay

[actsnoblemartin]

gay o sore ass started it.

:lol:


isnt that classed as just a little too much information ?
are you gay

[Psychoblues]

I thinketh you read a little too much into the response of gabby.


gay o sore ass started it.

:lol:

Are you trying to insult me or what?

[actsnoblemartin]

heck no, I have no interest or reason to insult you.

I respect you, sorry that you feel i was insulting you


I thinketh you read a little too much into the response of gabby.



Are you trying to insult me or what?

[gabosaurus]

Acts, are you upset with Psycho and me because you aren't getting any?

[Cheyenne]

Michele Weiner-Davis' latest book, Sex Starved Wife, launches this week and she'll be on the Today Show on Monday January 7 in the 8am hour. She's
also going to be featured in USA Today Monday. And, she's featured in this
week's edition of Newsweek. And, she's doing a keynote at Smart Marriages in
San Francisco.


What happens when a husband's libido lags? Two new books offer advice on a
surprisingly common problem.
By Joan Raymond
Newsweek
Jan 4, 2008

Beth Leary is one of those lucky people who are still happy after nearly 20
years of marriage. Leary (not her real name) and her husband are the best of
friends. Both are middle-aged college-educated professionals with demanding
jobs. But they call each other frequently during the day to chat, go to church together, and spend their limited free time either going out to restaurants or
staying at home reading and enjoying each other's company. Many women would envy the setup. Except for one thing: Leary and her husband rarely have sex.
By her estimate, they make love about every other month. And it's always at
her urging. "In terms of sex, this isn't what I signed up for," she says. "But I don't think we're that unusual."

Leary may be on to something. Research shows that about 20 percent or more of the married among us are DINS: Dual Income No Sex couples. While conventional wisdom holds that it's usually women who aren't up for sex (no pun intended), marriage experts say that's not necessarily true. Many men who are physically capable of having sex don't fit the stereotypical image of macho sex machines who want to do "it" anytime, anyplace. . . .

For the full article:
http://www.newsweek.com/id/84397/output/print

[Classact]

lyFrom my experience on 10% or less of women enjoy sex equal to men. Almost every relationship is based on sex first followed by other secondary reasons. The more education the less importance sex has in either sex.

Men deprived of sex by their wives either take one of the following paths, eat for pleasure, justify buying toys to entertain themselves, seek out power or cheat on their partners while doing the above.

[Psychoblues]

Are you still living with that 10% of which you speak, ca? I doubt it.

[Said1]

Are you still living with that 10% of which you speak, ca? I doubt it.

Oh puulease. This is the same guy who likes to watch farm animals fuck.

[Psychoblues]

Still telling lies, I see.


Oh puulease. This is the same guy who likes to watch farm animals fuck.

Watching anything fuck is absolutely a republican thing for which I am unfamiliar. I did, however, reference that obsession in a previous thread and now you want to hang it on me? Don't give up your day gig, S1. Even Atlantic City gets better than you from off the streets of Harlem. Just when did the Comedy Channel tell you that you were rejected?

[actsnoblemartin]

Here are the reasons I am against marriage, www.nomarriage.com

that is my opinion..

[Psychoblues]

And you are entitled to that opinion, martin. Why would you want to diminish or even eliminate the rights of other Americans to feel differently on that subject or any other?

[actsnoblemartin]

I didnt say anything about diminishing or taking away anyones rights.

I just dont believe in marriage, and i want to simply express my viewpoint.


And you are entitled to that opinion, martin. Why would you want to diminish or even eliminate the rights of other Americans to feel differently on that subject or any other?

[Psychoblues]

And I said that you were entitled to that viewpoint. Is someone giving you a hard time about that? Let me know.

[actsnoblemartin]

some people do, but more about the fact i dont want kids


And I said that you were entitled to that viewpoint. Is someone giving you a hard time about that? Let me know.

[avatar4321]

I get all the sex I want and need in my own home, gabby. Where're you getting yours?

Psycho reproducing... that's a scary thought.

[Psychoblues]

You have a tough time getting it up, don't you a'21?



Psycho reproducing... that's a scary thought.

That was posted many days ago and you are just now getting enough manhood to respond?

[avatar4321]

You have a tough time getting it up, don't you a'21?




That was posted many days ago and you are just now getting enough manhood to respond?

i dont check this folder often. I have other priorities.

Besides, you aren't exactly one to talk. You've resurrected threads that were dead for weeks to respond to posts.

[Hugh Lincoln]

lyFrom my experience on 10% or less of women enjoy sex equal to men. Almost every relationship is based on sex first followed by other secondary reasons. The more education the less importance sex has in either sex.

Men deprived of sex by their wives either take one of the following paths, eat for pleasure, justify buying toys to entertain themselves, seek out power or cheat on their partners while doing the above.

It also seems to me that men love sex, and women don't. Period. That makes evolutionary sense: a man's gotta impregnate and that's a one-shot deal, excuse the pun. A woman needs to be very choosy and is out of sexual commission for months before and after the baby's birth. So it doesn't surprise me that you'd have that difference.

The problem is what to do about this. Marriage is supposed to prevent cheating, but the drive is so powerful, I almost wonder if the lack of satisfaction isn't causing more problems than it solves. It's hard to figure how women could get so upset about cheating without realizing some of this. You won't do it with your husband, but you're hurt that he cheats? Can't have it both ways, madam. I guess this is why the French have mistresses. There are good reasons for fidelity and I understand that 'open marriages' don't really work very well, but still. You can't question this in America because it's taboo. We get in enough trouble without openly tolerating cheating. But it still seems worth it to examine the issue. It just seems way too fucking much (excuse me again) to expect a man (or a woman) to just forgo this wonderful human act for the rest of their natural lives. I'm not even sure God would sign off on that... otherwise, why'd he make it so good? A dilemma.

[Cheyenne]

It also seems to me that men love sex, and women don't. Maybe it's the women you're choosing???

...... Marriage is supposed to prevent cheating, ........ Can't have it both ways, madam. ......It just seems way too f**king much (excuse me again) to expect a man (or a woman) to just forgo this wonderful human act for the rest of their natural lives. I'm not even sure God would sign off on that... otherwise, why'd he make it so good? A dilemma.Sex was designed to be the privilege of marriage. Christian partners who do not have sex or refuse to have sex (there is a difference) are not following Bible principles. They need to find out & correct the problem.
But it seems that this is now very wide-spread among married couples in general; BOTH men & women. We are finding other ways to spend our time & energy rather than being intimate with our partner. And that, for our marriages & families, is rather scary.

[Dilloduck]

Maybe it's the women you're choosing???
Sex was designed to be the privilege of marriage. Christian partners who do not have sex or refuse to have sex (there is a difference) are not following Bible principles. They need to find out & correct the problem.
But it seems that this is now very wide-spread among married couples in general; BOTH men & women. We are finding other ways to spend our time & energy rather than being intimate with our partner. And that, for our marriages & families, is rather scary.

Sex was designed to be the privilege of marriage ??? :laugh2:

[Hugh Lincoln]

Christian partners who do not have sex or refuse to have sex (there is a difference) are not following Bible principles. They need to find out & correct the problem.

They're also not following the LAW of most states. Believe it or not, unreasonable refusals to participate in sex can be grounds for divorce. I don't know of cases where this actually happened, since tons of other stuff is usually involved, but yes: A man could (in my state) file for divorce on grounds that she just won't do it with him.

But again, that seems a rather extreme (and expensive) reaction.

[actsnoblemartin]

I think sex is misused in our society, it is meant to be an expression of love between two married people

and just because i dont want to get married, doesnt mean i support fornication.

[Dilloduck]

I think sex is misused in our society, it is meant to be an expression of love between two married people

and just because i dont want to get married, doesnt mean i support fornication.

Sex is "meant" to have babies. You understand it came WAY before marriage don't you ?

[actsnoblemartin]

yes I understand that, but we became a better society when children were born in wedlock, and have become worse since sex and marriage became meaningless to our culture


Sex is "meant" to have babies. You understand it came WAY before marriage don't you ?

[Dilloduck]

yes I understand that, but we became a better society when children were born in wedlock, and have become worse since sex and marriage became meaningless to our culture

Marriage was a good invention to help regulate society as long as people are willing to be regulated.

[Cheyenne]

They're also not following the LAW of most states. Believe it or not, unreasonable refusals to participate in sex can be grounds for divorce. I don't know of cases where this actually happened, since tons of other stuff is usually involved, but yes: A man could (in my state) file for divorce on grounds that she just won't do it with him.

But again, that seems a rather extreme (and expensive) reaction.Yes, it is grounds in most states. Seems our lawmakers (at one time) understood marriage. Honestly, would you stay with a partner who was healthy & normal, that would not engage in sex with you? And if so, why?


Marriage was a good invention to help regulate society as long as people are willing to be regulated.
Sex is "meant" to have babies. You understand it came WAY before marriage don't you ?I don't understand your line of thinking. You argue such good points, sometimes.

[Classact]

Oh puulease. This is the same guy who likes to watch farm animals fuck.And I guess as you were growing up you had no interest at all about animals having sex? The funny thing is that I could never even imagine my parents doing that... Last night I watched two gecko's getting it on on the ceiling of my back porch... now that's cool because the female hangs on with three legs as she pulls her tail out of the way UPSIDE DOWN!!! These geckos are translucent, you can see the insects in their intestines but sadly their little penis's are translucent... But the female licks herself after she is owned so I guess he either did her good or she had to finish up by herself... upside down by the light bulb with no net!

If by chance you were on a farm when you were a teen and a 3,000 pound bull mounted a cow and missed and four feet of pink meat shot out and a pint of come shot twenty feet away you wouldn't have been interested when he hit the sweet spot? That's cold... bet you wish you could lock up on a man like a bitch dog now don't you? I have a black friend that told me of a woman that trained her muscles and could move them like milking a cow as they had slow sex... I'd love to meet that woman and introduce her to my wife...and, you!

[Dilloduck]

Yes, it is grounds in most states. Seems our lawmakers (at one time) understood marriage. Honestly, would you stay with a partner who was healthy & normal, that would not engage in sex with you? And if so, why?

I don't understand your line of thinking. You argue such good points, sometimes.

Pretty straight foreward facts--sex is the way we reproduce and marriage was an invention by man to regulate society.

[Cheyenne]

Pretty straight foreward facts--sex is the way we reproduce and marriage was an invention by man to regulate society.

So what you're telling me is that you aren't a Bible believer?

[Dilloduck]

So what you're telling me is that you aren't a Bible believer?

noooo not saying that at all !

[Cheyenne]

noooo not saying that at all !So then what are you saying?

[Dilloduck]

So then what are you saying?


Pretty straight foreward facts--sex is the way we reproduce and marriage was an invention by man to regulate society.

That--whats confusing about it?

[Cheyenne]

That--whats confusing about it?

Because if you believe in the Bible then you know marriage was instituted in Eden by God, not by man.

[Dilloduck]

Because if you believe in the Bible then you know marriage was instituted in Eden by God, not by man.

So you are only acknowledging one form of marriage ?

[Cheyenne]

So you are only acknowledging one form of marriage ?

How many forms are there?

[Dilloduck]

How many forms are there?

Several.

[Cheyenne]

Several.

I'd be interested in hearing what you have to say, but I don't much feel like playing one word games tonight.

[Dilloduck]

I'd be interested in hearing what you have to say, but I don't much feel like playing one word games tonight.

I've made a statement about sex and marriage that you disagree with. Why don't you elaborate on why you disagree? The are different forms of marriage all over the world--even within our own country and sex is certainly involved in procreation.

[Cheyenne]

I've made a statement about sex and marriage that you disagree with. Why don't you elaborate on why you disagree? The are different forms of marriage all over the world--even within our own country and sex is certainly involved in procreation.
There never use to be but now we've become diverse.
I say marriage one man & one woman.
And as far as sex, you make it sound like if you can't bear children or are past childbearing years, you can't have sex. Yes, it is the best way to procreate, but sex between a man & a woman is for A LOT more than just making babies.

[Dilloduck]

There never use to be but now we've become diverse.
I say marriage one man & one woman.
And as far as sex, you make it sound like if you can't bear children or are past childbearing years, you can't have sex. Yes, it is the best way to procreate, but sex between a man & a woman is for A LOT more than just making babies.

Polygamy existed thousands of years before Christ. I never said procreation was the only reson for having sex but I'm pretty sure that it's one of the main purposes for it. The fact that it feels good probably comes in a close second. Who knows---that may be first now, come to think of it.

[manu1959]

There never use to be but now we've become diverse.
I say marriage one man & one woman.
And as far as sex, you make it sound like if you can't bear children or are past childbearing years, you can't have sex. Yes, it is the best way to procreate, but sex between a man & a woman is for A LOT more than just making babies.

sex between a man & a woman is for A LOT more than just making babies......

so is sex between a woman and a woman or a man and a man.....

love is love ....

sex is sex....

who are we to judge........

[Cheyenne]

Polygamy existed thousands of years before Christ. I never said procreation was the only reson for having sex but I'm pretty sure that it's one of the main purposes for it. The fact that it feels good probably comes in a close second. Who knows---that may be first now, come to think of it.So polygamy existed before Christ? That isn't what the original plan was & you know that. And in some places polygamy exists, but it's more a cult than a marriage. And now, even common law isn't accepted as a form of marriage.
Marriage, family, the world in general, is a far cry from what the plan was. But those of us who still believe in the sanctity of marriage keep in there punching for what we think is right.


manu1959]sex between a man & a woman is for A LOT more than just making babies......
so is sex between a woman and a woman or a man and a man.....
love is love ....sex is sex....who are we to judge........We live by rules, guidelines & laws.
Physical laws tells us that 2 objects can't occupy the same space at the same time. When they try accidents occur.
The law of the land as well as that of the Bible says murder is wrong. So, we don't go around killing people.
But the Bible also says it's wrong to steal, covet, gossip, engage in homosexuality, lie, bow down to graven images........
If you don't believe in God & the Bible, fine, I'm not twisting your arm saying you must believe as I do. But don't try to cajole me into what I believe is so wrong, either.

[manu1959]

We live by rules, guidelines & laws.
Physical laws tells us that 2 objects can't occupy the same space at the same time. When they try accidents occur.
The law of the land as well as that of the Bible says murder is wrong. So, we don't go around killing people.
But the Bible also says it's wrong to steal, covet, gossip, engage in homosexuality, lie, bow down to graven images........
If you don't believe in God & the Bible, fine, I'm not twisting your arm saying you must believe as I do. But don't try to cajole me into what I believe is so wrong, either.

i was simply saying that if one says accept me and the way i live and what i believe in why can not another expect the same in return.....

[Dilloduck]

So polygamy existed before Christ? That isn't what the original plan was & you know that. And in some places polygamy exists, but it's more a cult than a marriage. And now, even common law isn't accepted as a form of marriage.
Marriage, family, the world in general, is a far cry from what the plan was. But those of us who still believe in the sanctity of marriage keep in there punching for what we think is right.


Where in the Old Testament is this "original plan" ?

[Abbey Marie]

Regarding the original article/study/survey, I truly do not understand this facination with other people's sex lives. Whether 20 million or 100 million people are no longer having sex really should mean nothing to anyone except those people. Unless it's an issue of population decline, have sex, don't have sex, who the heck cares?

As for the thread, that's fine, we can discuss anything here that interests us. And the thread did take an interesting turn. I just don't get the point of these studies, and whatever money was spent to do it would have been better used for charity. Any charity.

[gabosaurus]

I totally agree. Marriage is a covenant between a couple to love, honor and obey, until death do they part. I don't recall seeing anything about sex in there.

I am pretty sure than there are a ton of marriages that are sexless through necessity and not by choice. Say if one partner is injured or otherwise unable to have sex. The true faithful partner will stand by his/her mate, for better or for worse.
The worthless piece of shit will dump his/her partner (the "Newt Syndrome"), or else go looking for satisfaction on the side. Therefore placing their sexual needs above their marriage vow of faithfulness.

I love sex and crave sexual satisfaction as much as any young person. But if my husband was involved in some sort of accident today and left unable to function, my sex life would be over. Because my husband is more important to me than that.
Your opinion may differ.

[Dilloduck]

Marriage has many components and can as varied as the millons or (billions) who call themselves married. There are legal, civil and religious ramifications. IMHO the understanding and expectations that are made between those involved carry as least as much if not more weight than those who would like to define how marriage SHOULD be for everyone.

[Psychoblues]

Thanks for the rep and straightening all that out, S'1.



Oh puulease. This is the same guy who likes to watch farm animals fuck.

You know what a joy it is to communicate on a more informed level!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Cheyenne]

i was simply saying that if one says accept me and the way i live and what i believe in why can not another expect the same in return.....
Sorry.
But isn't what you describe the essence of marriage?


But if my husband was involved in some sort of accident today and left unable to function, my sex life would be over. Because my husband is more important to me than that.I'm sure your husband will glad to hear it. But surely you are wise enough to know that there are other ways to be intimate without Tab A fitting into Slot B. Only in extreme cases is one totally incapacitated to this point.



Where in the Old Testament is this "original plan" ?I believe you will find it in the Creation story. Genesis 2:21-25. God made Adam a partner, ONE woman, brought her to Adam, told them to procreate. A man shall leave his father & mother & cleave unto his WIFE, not wives, and they will be one flesh.


Marriage has many components and can as varied as the millons or (billions) who call themselves married. There are legal, civil and religious ramifications. IMHO the understanding and expectations that are made between those involved carry as least as much if not more weight than those who would like to define how marriage SHOULD be for everyone.So then you think same-sex marriage is okay? I'm not talking about your marriage being identical to mine. What two people decide inside their relationship & call it a marriage is their business. This is referring to men & women who have thought they were going to have sex in their marital relationship and are being denied this privilege.



Regarding the original article/study/survey, I truly do not understand this facination with other people's sex lives. Whether 20 million or 100 million people are no longer having sex really should mean nothing to anyone except those people. Unless it's an issue of population decline, have sex, don't have sex, who the heck cares?

As for the thread, that's fine, we can discuss anything here that interests us. And the thread did take an interesting turn. I just don't get the point of these studies, and whatever money was spent to do it would have been better used for charity. Any charity.Ah, hit a dry spell have we?
Do you realize the truly sad implications of this "study"??? This is just one more way that Satan is destroying marriage & the family. This most intimate act between a man & a woman in love, sharing a part of yourself that you share with no other, is not occurring between married people. Divide & conquer.

[typomaniac]

Do you realize the truly sad implications of this "study"??? This is just one more way that Satan is destroying marriage & the family. This most intimate act between a man & a woman in love, sharing a part of yourself that you share with no other, is not occurring between married people. Divide & conquer.

To say that Satan is destroying marriage and family is an utter cop-out. Only the choices made by married people and members of a family can do that.

Besides, plenty of Christians say that God lives within every human. If that's true, Satan lives in every human also.

[darin]

Besides, plenty of Christians say that God lives within every human. If that's true, Satan lives in every human also.

No major christian faith or church teaches "God is in everybody". Also, there's a false delimma there - sorta. IF God was in everybody, there's no requirement that satan be in everybody, too.

[Cheyenne]

To say that Satan is destroying marriage and family is an utter cop-out. Only the choices made by married people and members of a family can do that.

Besides, plenty of Christians say that God lives within every human. If that's true, Satan lives in every human also.

Well no it isn't, either. Are you aware that you have been born into a world at war; Good vs Evil? The attacks made upon good people? If Satan can get just one more........
You are correct that people make their choices, but they aren't always the wisest ones, now are they? And where do you think those bad choices come from?

God only lives in the hearts of those who invite Him in.

[Dilloduck]

I believe you will find it in the Creation story. Genesis 2:21-25. God made Adam a partner, ONE woman, brought her to Adam, told them to procreate. A man shall leave his father & mother & cleave unto his WIFE, not wives, and they will be one flesh.



One wife---hell--there was only one woman !! :laugh2:

[Abbey Marie]

Sorry.
But isn't what you describe the essence of marriage?

I'm sure your husband will glad to hear it. But surely you are wise enough to know that there are other ways to be intimate without Tab A fitting into Slot B. Only in extreme cases is one totally incapacitated to this point.


I believe you will find it in the Creation story. Genesis 2:21-25. God made Adam a partner, ONE woman, brought her to Adam, told them to procreate. A man shall leave his father & mother & cleave unto his WIFE, not wives, and they will be one flesh.

So then you think same-sex marriage is okay? I'm not talking about your marriage being identical to mine. What two people decide inside their relationship & call it a marriage is their business. This is referring to men & women who have thought they were going to have sex in their marital relationship and are being denied this privilege.


Ah, hit a dry spell have we?
Do you realize the truly sad implications of this "study"??? This is just one more way that Satan is destroying marriage & the family. This most intimate act between a man & a woman in love, sharing a part of yourself that you share with no other, is not occurring between married people. Divide & conquer.

I think you are putting way too much emphasis on a study that may or may not even be correct. And to assume that it is Satan who is causing it is a stretch. One could just as easily attibute it to a God who is unhappy with the sex-obsessed society he is seeing.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt by asking: What are you implying by saying I've "hit a dry spell"?

[Cheyenne]

I think you are putting way too much emphasis on a study that may or may not even be correct. And to assume that it is Satan who is causing it is a stretch. One could just as easily attibute it to a God who is unhappy with the sex-obsessed society he is seeing.

I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt by asking: What are you implying by saying I've "hit a dry spell"?It was a joke.

I didn't say this study was the be all, end all. I found it interesting. And yes, I believe the family & marriage is in the state it's in, despite all of our enlightenment, because these marriages are not God-centered.


One wife---hell--there was only one woman !! :laugh2:Hence the template for a one man one woman relationship.

[Dilloduck]

It was a joke.

I didn't say this study was the be all, end all. I found it interesting. And yes, I believe the family & marriage is in the state it's in, despite all of our enlightenment, because these marriages are not God-centered.

Hence the template for a one man one woman relationship.

You mean once you have sex with someone you're automatically married to them? Sexless marriages cannot be God-centered ??

[Cheyenne]

You mean once you have sex with someone you're automatically married to them? Sexless marriages cannot be God-centered ??I won't go as far as that though the Bible does speak quite frankly about adultery. And since sex is what once set a marriage apart from all other relationship.

How can a marriage be God-centered & not engage in the specific activity God deemed especially for marriage???
In a God centered marriage you reap all the benefits & blessings from that relationship. The closer you are to God the closer you will be to each other. That is not to say there won't be problems, but a couple who can get on their knees together with their problems will find a quicker & much happier solution.

[Dilloduck]

I won't go as far as that though the Bible does speak quite frankly about adultery. And since sex is what once set a marriage apart from all other relationship.

How can a marriage be God-centered & not engage in the specific activity God deemed especially for marriage???
In a God centered marriage you reap all the benefits & blessings from that relationship. The closer you are to God the closer you will be to each other. That is not to say there won't be problems, but a couple who can get on their knees together with their problems will find a quicker & much happier solution.

Basically is does say one should be married to another to be have sex but why? Does it say why or is it part of the tradition of the time when is was the custom for men to have more than one wife and wives were considered property ?

[typomaniac]

God only lives in the hearts of those who invite Him in.

Your god does. The real God lives only in my heart, and in the hearts of those I say he lives in. ;)

[Cheyenne]

Basically is does say one should be married to another to be have sex but why? .....There shouldn't have to be Bible proof as to why. Do you understand, not only the physical aspect of sex, but the psychological & emotional aspect, as well?
Even though it is more physical for a man & more emotional for a woman, you can't exclude the physical benefits a woman enjoys nor can you exclude the emotional benefits for the man when he experiences sex with someone he truly loves & trusts.

Why would you want to share this most intimate part of yourself with just anyone, just because you can? It not only cheapens the sex act, it cheapens the institution of marriage, and one's own person.

[Dilloduck]

There shouldn't have to be Bible proof as to why. Do you understand, not only the physical aspect of sex, but the psychological & emotional aspect, as well?
Even though it is more physical for a man & more emotional for a woman, you can't exclude the physical benefits a woman enjoys nor can you exclude the emotional benefits for the man when he experiences sex with someone he truly loves & trusts.

Why would you want to share this most intimate part of yourself with just anyone, just because you can? It not only cheapens the sex act, it cheapens the institution of marriage, and one's own person.

I'm not suggesting that you have sex with 'just anyone' and I think sex obviously can be beneficial to the man AND the women. To think that women only have sex for the emotion is absurd although some would tell you that a womans sexuality is more "spiritual".
If a married couple is no longer interested in sex that's their business--they can still love each other intensely.

[Cheyenne]

I'm not suggesting that you have sex with 'just anyone' and I think sex obviously can be beneficial to the man AND the women. To think that women only have sex for the emotion is absurd although some would tell you that a womans sexuality is more "spiritual".Yeah, yeah,what-ev-er. Sounds r-e-a-l-l-y good though, doesn't it? :wink2:

If a married couple is no longer interested in sex that's their business--they can still love each other intensely.Sure you can love someone without sex. You love your dad, your brother, friends. And if BOTH people inside the marriage decide this, that's fine. But that's not what this "study" was implying.
And truthfully, you cannot have a "marriage" without intimacy. HOW you get that intimacy is between the couple, I agree. But if you are not intimate, you cannot stay connected. All you are doing is occupying the same house, like roommates. You will never experience the most wonderful, awesome & fulfilling relationship that marriage was meant to be.

[Hugh Lincoln]

Honestly, would you stay with a partner who was healthy & normal, that would not engage in sex with you? And if so, why?

Divorce pretty much renders a man a financial eunuch for the rest of his life. Kids are screwed up by it. Those are two big reasons.

[gabosaurus]

Divorce pretty much renders a man a financial eunuch for the rest of his life. Kids are screwed up by it. Those are two big reasons.

If you don't want to be rendered a "financial eunuch," don't screw up your marriage. Don't insist on your wife being a stay at home mom. Don't have kids if you don't want to support them. It's your responsibility as a parent.

Marriage doesn't have a shelf life. You can't suddenly decide you are tired of your partner and trade him/her in for a new one. When you decide to get married, you should know your partner well enough to be familiar with their pros and cons, pluses and minuses.
If something happens and renders your partner unable to engage in a normal sexual relationship, that does not give you an excuse to fulfill yourself elsewhere. With our without your partner's consent. You might not have to answer to your partner, but you will eventually have to answer to God.

[Dilloduck]

If you don't want to be rendered a "financial eunuch," don't screw up your marriage. Don't insist on your wife being a stay at home mom. Don't have kids if you don't want to support them. It's your responsibility as a parent.

Marriage doesn't have a shelf life. You can't suddenly decide you are tired of your partner and trade him/her in for a new one. When you decide to get married, you should know your partner well enough to be familiar with their pros and cons, pluses and minuses.
If something happens and renders your partner unable to engage in a normal sexual relationship, that does not give you an excuse to fulfill yourself elsewhere. With our without your partner's consent. You might not have to answer to your partner, but you will eventually have to answer to God.

the old pro speaks !!!!:lol:

[Abbey Marie]

If you don't want to be rendered a "financial eunuch," don't screw up your marriage. Don't insist on your wife being a stay at home mom. Don't have kids if you don't want to support them. It's your responsibility as a parent.

Marriage doesn't have a shelf life. You can't suddenly decide you are tired of your partner and trade him/her in for a new one. When you decide to get married, you should know your partner well enough to be familiar with their pros and cons, pluses and minuses.
If something happens and renders your partner unable to engage in a normal sexual relationship, that does not give you an excuse to fulfill yourself elsewhere. With our without your partner's consent. You might not have to answer to your partner, but you will eventually have to answer to God.

All excellent points.

And we shouldn't go into marriage expecting our spouse to give our life its "meaning". It's too much to expect of another, and people will always let us down in one way or another.

[Dilloduck]

All excellent points.

And we shouldn't go into marriage expecting our spouse to give our life its "meaning". It's too much to expect of another, and people will always let us down in one way or another.

Since people some into marriage with their own ideas about what it means it might be a good idea to compare notes. You might be surprised.

[Abbey Marie]

Since people some into marriage with their own ideas about what it means it might be a good idea to compare notes. You might be surprised.

I might be surprised by what?

[Dilloduck]

I might be surprised by what?

It wasn't meant to be personal LOL sorry for the misunderstanding !!

[Abbey Marie]

It wasn't meant to be personal LOL sorry for the misunderstanding !!

No problem- it's one of those threads, I think. :)

So, what did you think people generally might be surprised by?

[Dilloduck]

No problem- it's one of those threads, I think. :)

So, what did you think people generally might be surprised by?

How many pre-conceptions people have about what marriage 'means' that are so ingrained that they only show themselves after a problem arises. The belief that after marriage one is required to fullfill his/her partners sexual needs on demand is a new one on me.

[Cheyenne]

....... after marriage one is required to fullfill his/her partners sexual needs on demand is a new one on me.Where in this article or any of the responses in this thread has this statement been made or implied?

[Dilloduck]

Where in this article or any of the responses in this thread has this statement been made or implied?

I didn't state it was made in this thread-----this isn't the only thread about marriage that has ever existed here.

[Abbey Marie]

How many pre-conceptions people have about what marriage 'means' that are so ingrained that they only show themselves after a problem arises. The belief that after marriage one is required to fullfill his/her partners sexual needs on demand is a new one on me.

One thing is certain: women really need to stay away from those romance novels. :laugh2:

[Dilloduck]

One thing is certain: women really need to stay away from those romance novels. :laugh2:

There are a heck of a lot of stories men gotta get outta there brains too.:laugh2:
It ain't always a picnic.

[Cheyenne]

I ----this isn't the only thread about marriage that has ever existed here.I think you hit the wrong button & missed the PMS thread.

[Dilloduck]

I think you hit the wrong button & missed the PMS thread.

LMAO----sure wasn't me who started a thread about people not having sex :laugh2:

[Cheyenne]

How many pre-conceptions people have about what marriage 'means' that are so ingrained that they only show themselves after a problem arises.......This is so true. I would be curious as to what some of those 'preconceived' ideas might be from the DP family.

[Psychoblues]

Exactly, Cheyenne.




This is so true. I would be curious as to what some of those 'preconceived' ideas might be from the DP family.

There is obviously plenty of trouble in the sex lives of these reich wingers.

[Lee~*]

If men were truley superior to women they would be flexible enough to get their head between their legs :laugh2:

Did you ever wonder why God gave breasts to women and not men?

Because if he had, nothing would ever get done, they'd sit around all day trying to get them in their mouth! :laugh2: :laugh2: Lee~*

[gabosaurus]

I remember a George Carlin routine about the canine habit of licking their balls:

"This is an amazing thing! If I could reach, I'd never leave the house!" :laugh2:

[Dilloduck]

I remember a George Carlin routine about the canine habit of licking their balls:

"This is an amazing thing! If I could reach, I'd never leave the house!" :laugh2:

Hmmmmm maybe that explains stay at home moms too !!! :laugh2:

[typomaniac]

Hmmmmm maybe that explains stay at home moms too !!! :laugh2:

The real reason women get boob jobs... :D

[Dilloduck]

The real reason women get boob jobs... :D

and shower heads :laugh2: