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View Full Version : A time to examine: any regrets?



Abbey Marie
12-03-2007, 03:34 PM
As we approach the end of yet another year (and for me, another birthday) I cannot help but think about the passing of time. And with that, thougts always turn to how that time was spent. They say that no one ever cries out on their death bed that they wished they spent more time at work. Yet we must work to survive; to pay "the bills".

That eternal dichotomy haunts many of us. Work might be 70 hours in an office, trying to meet billable hours. It might be driving a truck long distances to make ends meet. It might be cleaning, cooking, laundering and shopping. It can be whatever keeps us from spending time with our children, or from pursuing enjoyable activites, whatever those might be.

I do spend a lot of time with my husband and my daughter- at least I think so! We find time for talks, games, and meals together. But I am sure I could do a lot more. I look at Darin's wife doing all of those things for her family, for example, and I think, now there's a great wife and mom. Comparisons are often deadly to self-esteem, aren't they?

Eventually, I think about the time I spend HERE, and I wonder if it is time well-spent. Sometimes, when things are really testy and cynical, I think that it may not be. But then I think how knowledgable I am about current events, to a degree I never was before. I think about the sweet e-friends I have made. I think about all the things I have learned (some of which I wish I hadn't, to be honest). And ultimately, I think debate keeps the mind sharp, and writing skills up. I believe that with anything, you get out of a message board what you put into it. If we honestly put ourselves into it, and try to express opinions with respect, I think we reap rewards.

So, I have no earth-shattering conclusions, except that I hope to be a better Christian, a better wife, mother, friend (and poster!) next year. As JohnDoe always likes to remind me, on the board, some of us are representing Christianity (and I would add, American culture) to many people. I hope to remember that there are many impressionable eyes out there reading what I write.

Thank you to those who have been friends to me (you know who you are), and to those who have taught me (you may be surprised who you are) and to Jim for letting me have the unforgettable experience of moderating a board full of VERY strong personalities. You definitely know who you are!

avatar4321
12-03-2007, 03:43 PM
any regrets? Actually, for the first time in a long time no.

I feel like I've grown so much this year. I feel like ive become far more capable physically, careerwise, spiritually, etc. I just feel like ive become a more rounded person. (and that has nothing to do with the shape of my stomach).

I know i can do better. but I know I did the best I can. And I am happy about it. Now its time to stretch myself to new levels and next year.

And Abbey, we all love you:)

typomaniac
12-03-2007, 03:44 PM
I regret that I haven't knocked some sense into more right-wing partisans. :)

diuretic
12-03-2007, 04:07 PM
I was just thinking about this the other day. I now work in a position that requires a lot of thinking. No, really, I'm not joking, I'm the only person doing this particular job and while much of it is fairly straightforward it does require quite a bit of sitting and down and working from nothing to develop ideas. I've found that through being here (and elsewhere) my critical thinking skills have improved and it shows in my work. So there you are, it does have an intellectual benefit Abbey :)

As Milton put, it, in a different context:


I cannot praise a fugitive and cloistered virtue, unexercised and unbreathed, that never sallies out and sees her adversary but slinks out of the race, where that immortal garland is to be run for, not without dust and heat. Assuredly we bring not innocence into the world, we bring impurity much rather; that which purifies us is trial, and trial is by what is contrary.

If we don't test our ideas then we'll never know if they're any good and we won't get a chance to improve them.

Abbey Marie
12-03-2007, 04:15 PM
any regrets? Actually, for the first time in a long time no.

I feel like I've grown so much this year. I feel like ive become far more capable physically, careerwise, spiritually, etc. I just feel like ive become a more rounded person. (and that has nothing to do with the shape of my stomach).

I know i can do better. but I know I did the best I can. And I am happy about it. Now its time to stretch myself to new levels and next year.

And Abbey, we all love you:)

Thank you so much. :)

I am glad that things are going so well for you! Your knowledge of who you are and what you believe, will help you tremendously in the years of practice ahead.

avatar4321
12-03-2007, 04:17 PM
I regret that I haven't knocked some sense into more right-wing partisans. :)

i dont know many people who have been beaten smarter. usually those who get knocked around get dumber.

typomaniac
12-03-2007, 04:21 PM
i dont know many people who have been beaten smarter. usually those who get knocked around get dumber.

Apparently some people thought that one could have sense knocked into him, or the expression wouldn't exist.

Abbey Marie
12-03-2007, 04:21 PM
Apparently some people thought that one could have sense knocked into him, or the expression wouldn't exist.

No other regrets, Typo? Well, maybe you are too young for those. Lucky you!

typomaniac
12-03-2007, 04:29 PM
No other regrets, Typo? Well, maybe you are too young for those. Lucky you!

I have this philosophy about regrets: if you can do something to improve or fix them, just go do it. If you can't, don't think about it.

Doesn't benefit anybody if you just sit around and depress yourself.

manu1959
12-03-2007, 05:01 PM
i too was reflecting on this the other day......we had our christmas party the other night.....we have a staff of 200 and their families......sometimes the responsibility can become overwhelming.....

as for regrets......i am with typo on this one.....if you regret it fix it.....if you can't fix it don't do it again.....and if need be apologize or forgive yourself....

April15
12-03-2007, 05:24 PM
I regret that I haven't knocked some sense into more right-wing partisans. :)Good luck with that.

manu1959
12-03-2007, 05:37 PM
I regret that I haven't knocked some sense into more right-wing partisans. :)

so now you are pro torture............

avatar4321
12-03-2007, 05:39 PM
Apparently some people thought that one could have sense knocked into him, or the expression wouldn't exist.

I think the expression has more to do with using intimidation and threats of violence to coerce people to agree with you more than anything.

Personally, I find persuading people through the merits of the argument much more fulfilling and efficient in the long run.

Said1
12-03-2007, 05:54 PM
Regret isn't that terrible. At least you've come to a realization about yourself, in some instances. No need to wollow in it though, change and move on!

typomaniac
12-03-2007, 06:04 PM
so now you are pro torture............

I'm not "pro-torture;" I'm just "pro-innovative persuasion methods." :death:

manu1959
12-03-2007, 08:48 PM
I'm not "pro-torture;" I'm just "pro-innovative persuasion methods." :death:

you sound like karl rove........

musicman
12-04-2007, 12:51 AM
What a beautiful and thoughtful post, Abbey! Thanks for sharing it with us.

As far as having regrets, I'd have to say that I'm of the same mindset as typo and manu; there just ain't time for it. When (not if) I screw up, I try to make it right the best I can, and get on with it. My heart is, overall, tolerably clean - I can still learn from my mistakes - and I know that God is at work in my life. It's like being on a grand adventure!