Etiquette question

[dan]

I just got back from the grocery store. There was an ambulance out front and as I went in, I saw that there was a lot of commotion in the doorway. Apparently, a lady, in her 40's or so and overweight, had collapsed.

Well, in situations like this, I try to avoid the commotion altogether and here's why: first of all, the family was all standing around, looking upset, I didn't want to be all looky-loo, plus it's none of my business, anyway.

Now, the lady in front of me, on the other hand, decided to stop, stand there very obviously, with her hands on her shoulders, and stand around waiting for someone to explain what happened to her, I guess. And I noticed a good portion of the people there were all being very looky-loo about it.

So, I find that rude. But, I guess some people would take my reaction as not caring about the lady on the ground. What do you think?

[darin]

Yeah that lady - and the others were - was rude. It's none of her damned business what happened unless she's the store's Safety Officer, etc.

[Cheyenne]

..... a lady, in her 40's or so and overweight, had collapsed..... I didn't want to be all looky-loo, plus it's none of my business, anyway.....So, I find that rude. But, I guess some people would take my reaction as not caring about the lady on the ground. What do you think?

I, too stay out of the way. It isn't that I'm not concerned, there isn't anything I can do medically. I'm not good when it comes to that sort of thing; especially blood. I may ask in passing what happened. I may see if there is a family member & ask if there is anything I can do. I do try to be careful as I don't want to be seen as someone trying to drum up business.
I even had a woman once hand me her little girl; a complete stranger to her while, dealing with the accident she'd been in.

[Hagbard Celine]

No sh*tting at the dinner table. That's good etiquette.

[Mr. P]

There are 'rubber neckers everywhere.

[Hagbard Celine]

Personally, I avoid commotions like this the same way you do, just different reasons. It's not an etiquette issue for me, it's just that I don't care. If the lady had collapsed in front of me, I'd help her by making sure she was alive and calling the cops, but that's as far as it would go. As soon as the cops got there I'd give my statement and be off.

[Abbey Marie]

I feel the same way, Dan. I won't even look at accident scenes for the same reason. It just feels wrong.

[MtnBiker]

There were emergency personal on site, the woman's immediate needs were being attended to, so the intial concern for the woman can be dismissed, beyond that standing around a looking is would be serving your personal curiosity. You did the right thing Dan.

[Hagbard Celine]

If you don't know the person, i.e. they're outside your "monkey sphere (http://www.pointlesswasteoftime.com/monkeysphere.html)," there's no reason for you to loiter around.

[Pale Rider]

It's the same thing when there's an accident on the highway. Traffic will be backed up for miles, but when you finaly get up to the scene, you see that the only reason traffic is moving so slowly and is so backed up is because of the sons a bitchin' rubber neckers. There's nothing in the way impeding traffic.

I'd walk right past the scene you described dan. It's being handled, and the lady that collapsed might be embarrassed enough already for causing such a scene and requiring all the attention. So people stopping and staring like cattle are just ignorant, stupid and inconsiderate.