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01-23-2023, 03:35 PM
Yale research: Highly successful people argue differently (https://www.cnbc.com/2023/01/19/yale-researchers-how-highly-successful-people-argue.html)
Instead of trying to “win” every argument you find yourself in, you could have more success if you look at arguments as opportunities to learn and grow.That’s according to Matthew Fisher, a psychologist and marketing professor at Southern Methodist University, who co-authored a 2016 study while at Yale University (https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cogs.12380) on the benefits of “arguing to learn.” “Being willing to hear out other perspectives and engage in dialogue that isn’t simply meant to convince the other person you’re right can lead to all sorts of unexpected insights,” Fisher tells CNBC Make It.
In fact, according to Fisher, keeping an open mind during an argument not only helps you learn new things, it can also help you land on the correct answer and make others more receptive to your point of view.
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Seo recommends thinking of a debate as an opportunity to clarify your own point of view, rather than a chance to “beat” someone else. In Seo’s telling, “both sides walk away feeling like they would do that again” in any good argument.
People areoften focused on what they’re going to say next, rather than what they’re learning from an argument. So Seo’s debating basics might make it easier to get your mind off the specifics of a debate and help you truly listen to your conversation partner.
He recommends trying to hit four “primary W’s” in any argument:
What’s your argument?
Why is it true?
When has it happened before?
Who cares?
It’s advice that can benefit most people, especially in the workplace, Fisher says. In environments where people in leadership positions are unwilling to admit they’re wrong, people might be too scared to speak up — and that’s the worst case scenario for any kind of conflict, because either one point of view dominates or the problem goes unsolved.
“That’s going to actually hurt everybody in the long term,” he says.
Instead of trying to “win” every argument you find yourself in, you could have more success if you look at arguments as opportunities to learn and grow.That’s according to Matthew Fisher, a psychologist and marketing professor at Southern Methodist University, who co-authored a 2016 study while at Yale University (https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1111/cogs.12380) on the benefits of “arguing to learn.” “Being willing to hear out other perspectives and engage in dialogue that isn’t simply meant to convince the other person you’re right can lead to all sorts of unexpected insights,” Fisher tells CNBC Make It.
In fact, according to Fisher, keeping an open mind during an argument not only helps you learn new things, it can also help you land on the correct answer and make others more receptive to your point of view.
...
Seo recommends thinking of a debate as an opportunity to clarify your own point of view, rather than a chance to “beat” someone else. In Seo’s telling, “both sides walk away feeling like they would do that again” in any good argument.
People areoften focused on what they’re going to say next, rather than what they’re learning from an argument. So Seo’s debating basics might make it easier to get your mind off the specifics of a debate and help you truly listen to your conversation partner.
He recommends trying to hit four “primary W’s” in any argument:
What’s your argument?
Why is it true?
When has it happened before?
Who cares?
It’s advice that can benefit most people, especially in the workplace, Fisher says. In environments where people in leadership positions are unwilling to admit they’re wrong, people might be too scared to speak up — and that’s the worst case scenario for any kind of conflict, because either one point of view dominates or the problem goes unsolved.
“That’s going to actually hurt everybody in the long term,” he says.