Tyr-Ziu Saxnot
09-28-2019, 10:18 AM
New Thread, First Story-- Tyr
The Tale Of The Lying Braggart From Braggadoccius, West Texas
Part One
( The New Man Arrives )
On a bright Monday morning in June, the new worker arrived on the job.
His attitude spoke to us as we saw his unkempt appearance. Obviously
he was a man of no great wealth nor much in the way of good looks.
Yet we at first did not hold such trivialities against the new lad.
After all, we ourselves were no men of wealth nor great and immense
sexual appeal to the ladies. Despite our secret thoughts about each
other, we did notice when this new employee spoke, his words came
out false from the start. Kinda like a jackass braying at the
morning sun because the day was born.
Our boss introduced the young man as A. Lance Stubbennover from
Braggadoccius, West Texas and according to his own humble admissions
he was a top hand at almost everything under the sun and then some!
With orders for us to give the new man a chance and teach him the
ropes, we saw his sneer as the boss uttered those last few words.
As the day wore on we did notice his lazy attitude, his constant
yapping and how at lunch he would top anything one of us said about
anything. To put it mildly this was annoying and to each of us spoke
of a lying braggart that was nary a great worker, a pleasant fellow
nor even intelligent enough to keep his yap shut.
As word had been given to us that he was either a friend of the big
boss or else a close blood relative of the big boss's wife, we held
our ever growing scorn for a few weeks!
Truth is after a month this guy was unbearable to be around. One could
not speak of anything that this guy hadn't done or often done far, far
better than the man speaking.
His tales grew larger, bolder and more outrageous and we grew more
pissed off at this lying piece of shit. Yet out of our great respect
for our boss we held back because of his respect and loyalty to us for
well over a decade.
About three months on, this bragging jackass began to regale us with
his vast experience at anything that came up. How he had always had these
marvelous and astounding abilities at genius level and beyond. Even to
the point of telling us of the royal bloodline he possessed by way of
his mother's heritage and how she came from a long line of German princes
of the 16th century! How he himself spoke eighteen languages fluently and
was then engaged in learning seven more!
To all this he added, how his military record was awarded several high honors
and how he had fought in Nam ranked as a Marine infantry captain that was
twice wounded in action! All this at the age of 23 years old and once how he
had saved an entire village from being bombed by sneaking in at night and all
by himself, crawled through the dark to slit the throats of 22 Vietcong fighters.
Thus freeing the poor villagers and then sending command orders to cancel the
planned predawn bombing run! All that, at tender young age of twenty-three years!
Yes sir, we thought surely nothing could top that whopper but within a week he
had topped it at least a dozen times over! Thus we found out there was no limit
to the number, size and/or sheer gall this lying bastard would happily and with
absolute ignorance proclaim his magnificent greatness at having done! Soon the
point came when we started questioning him as he lied like a damn rug.
Our thought was to maybe at least slow him down a bit but it only stirred him to
lie more and then start complaining to the big boss how we had started mistreating
him and were so unfairly being absolute jackasses.
Now after the big boss had chewed on us a bit and ordered us to not mistreat this
fine specimen of a man and this fine worker we started plotting our next move on how
to alleviate ourselves, of this loudmouth lying bore, this arrogant know-it-all braggart,
this odorous unkempt, dirty, lazy cretin. Thus we met at a local tavern away from this
asshole to plot how to expose this lout, this fool, this dumb-ass once and for all.
With full knowledge of the protection this worthless worm enjoyed through the big boss and
his family. After a few beers and the usual flirtation with the three pretty bar maids
a plan was hatched. One that we scheduled for the next Monday morning to commence....
to be continued - coming soon....
Part Two
(The New Plan And The Hope That It Succeeds )
The Tale Of The Lying Braggart From Braggadoccius, West Texas
Part One
( The New Man Arrives )
On a bright Monday morning in June, the new worker arrived on the job.
His attitude spoke to us as we saw his unkempt appearance. Obviously
he was a man of no great wealth nor much in the way of good looks.
Yet we at first did not hold such trivialities against the new lad.
After all, we ourselves were no men of wealth nor great and immense
sexual appeal to the ladies. Despite our secret thoughts about each
other, we did notice when this new employee spoke, his words came
out false from the start. Kinda like a jackass braying at the
morning sun because the day was born.
Our boss introduced the young man as A. Lance Stubbennover from
Braggadoccius, West Texas and according to his own humble admissions
he was a top hand at almost everything under the sun and then some!
With orders for us to give the new man a chance and teach him the
ropes, we saw his sneer as the boss uttered those last few words.
As the day wore on we did notice his lazy attitude, his constant
yapping and how at lunch he would top anything one of us said about
anything. To put it mildly this was annoying and to each of us spoke
of a lying braggart that was nary a great worker, a pleasant fellow
nor even intelligent enough to keep his yap shut.
As word had been given to us that he was either a friend of the big
boss or else a close blood relative of the big boss's wife, we held
our ever growing scorn for a few weeks!
Truth is after a month this guy was unbearable to be around. One could
not speak of anything that this guy hadn't done or often done far, far
better than the man speaking.
His tales grew larger, bolder and more outrageous and we grew more
pissed off at this lying piece of shit. Yet out of our great respect
for our boss we held back because of his respect and loyalty to us for
well over a decade.
About three months on, this bragging jackass began to regale us with
his vast experience at anything that came up. How he had always had these
marvelous and astounding abilities at genius level and beyond. Even to
the point of telling us of the royal bloodline he possessed by way of
his mother's heritage and how she came from a long line of German princes
of the 16th century! How he himself spoke eighteen languages fluently and
was then engaged in learning seven more!
To all this he added, how his military record was awarded several high honors
and how he had fought in Nam ranked as a Marine infantry captain that was
twice wounded in action! All this at the age of 23 years old and once how he
had saved an entire village from being bombed by sneaking in at night and all
by himself, crawled through the dark to slit the throats of 22 Vietcong fighters.
Thus freeing the poor villagers and then sending command orders to cancel the
planned predawn bombing run! All that, at tender young age of twenty-three years!
Yes sir, we thought surely nothing could top that whopper but within a week he
had topped it at least a dozen times over! Thus we found out there was no limit
to the number, size and/or sheer gall this lying bastard would happily and with
absolute ignorance proclaim his magnificent greatness at having done! Soon the
point came when we started questioning him as he lied like a damn rug.
Our thought was to maybe at least slow him down a bit but it only stirred him to
lie more and then start complaining to the big boss how we had started mistreating
him and were so unfairly being absolute jackasses.
Now after the big boss had chewed on us a bit and ordered us to not mistreat this
fine specimen of a man and this fine worker we started plotting our next move on how
to alleviate ourselves, of this loudmouth lying bore, this arrogant know-it-all braggart,
this odorous unkempt, dirty, lazy cretin. Thus we met at a local tavern away from this
asshole to plot how to expose this lout, this fool, this dumb-ass once and for all.
With full knowledge of the protection this worthless worm enjoyed through the big boss and
his family. After a few beers and the usual flirtation with the three pretty bar maids
a plan was hatched. One that we scheduled for the next Monday morning to commence....
to be continued - coming soon....
Part Two
(The New Plan And The Hope That It Succeeds )