forgiving assholes

[darin]

The part i like best

"Forgiveness is about us. Maybe holding onto the evil or harm does not combat evil - maybe it feeds it."


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhmRkUtPra8

[Kathianne]

1st step, stop thinking of the aholes as aholes. ;) Easier said, . . .

Resentments hurts the holder, not the recipient. I think that is my motivator. I also try to keep in mind how often I need to be forgiven, that helps.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

God forgives, I don't.

If someone killed say my mother, I'd do everything in my power to kill that sons a bitch, and forgiveness would never enter my mind.

If someone stole something from me, forgiveness would never enter my mind.

And it doesn't bother me a bit.

[Gunny]

1st step, stop thinking of the aholes as aholes. ;) Easier said, . . .

Resentments hurts the holder, not the recipient. I think that is my motivator. I also try to keep in mind how often I need to be forgiven, that helps.If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

The ting you hate the most.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

The ting you hate the most.
"If."

[Kathianne]

If you have become the things you hate the most in others, what have you become?

The ting you hate the most.

It seems most people are not self-reflective. Often they are doing what they accuse others of, yet never see it in themselves. In any case, getting pissed at them and holding onto it, well it won't bother them at all.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

It seems most people are not self-reflective. Often they are doing what they accuse others of, yet never see it in themselves. In any case, getting pissed at them and holding onto it, well it won't bother them at all.
That's alright Kathy, you can quote me and reply to me directly. No need to attempt at a side swipe.

What is "self-reflective?" And are you accusing me of "doing what they accuse other's of?"

Let me be clear, I'm talking about MURDERERS, RAPISTS, THIEVES, LIARS, ETC, yes, I hate these people, and no, I have zero forgiveness for them, but because I hate them you think I'm going to BECOME ONE OF THEM, or worse yet, I AM one of them?

How utterly ridiculous.

[Kathianne]

That's alright Kathy, you can quote me and reply to me directly. No need to attempt at a side swipe.

What is "self-reflective?" And are you accusing me of "doing what they accuse other's of?"

Let me be clear, I'm talking about MURDERERS, RAPISTS, THIEVES, LIARS, ETC, yes, I hate these people, and no, I have zero forgiveness for them, but because I hate them you think I'm going to BECOME ONE OF THEM, or worse yet, I AM one of them?

How utterly ridiculous.
I wasn't talking about you or anyone in particular. I'm simply disgusted with society in general and the political divide in particular. It's dangerous, IMO. On the other hand, no, I don't expect a soul to change.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

I wasn't talking about you or anyone in particular. I'm simply disgusted with society in general and the political divide in particular. It's dangerous, IMO. On the other hand, no, I don't expect a soul to change.
OK... then I'm sorry for assuming you were talking to me.

I'm a stand up guy, you'll always get the truth from me even it hurts or it's embarrassing, to me or anyone. I am NOT what I HATE, nor will I ever BECOME what I hate. I hate some people for a REASON, they're either CORRUPT or EVIL.

I try to be the best person I can be, but forgiving a murderer or a rapist or a thief, just as examples, isn't in the cards. Right or wrong, I'll leave that to God.

[SassyLady]

Some things are unforgivable. If not forgiving the person who molested me and my siblings mean I will have a dark spot on my soul, so be it.

[SassyLady]

And won't forgive my mom for allowing the asshole to come back to live with us after he got out of jail.

Some things just should not be forgiven.

[Kathianne]

And won't forgive my mom for allowing the asshole to come back to live with us after he got out of jail.

Some things just should not be forgiven.

On all you've written, I agree. I especially agree about your mom, that is horrendous.

That sort of experience, well the words are just not there, but unforgettable and life altering. At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.' The focus is on the perp and the enabler. I've no doubt you were hyper aware of adults, especially men around your children and now grandchildren.

I'm referring to people that do not come to that level, indeed, they are not worthy of the time and effort to keep them in mind. They may be a 'friend' that betrays in some way; a boss that is unreasonable or threatened; an ex, who one no longer must deal with, those types.

I certainly think being obsessed with someone we disagree with, no matter how strongly the disagreement is, wastes our time and in my case at least, raises my blood pressure to unmanageable levels. That is hurting me, not the object of my scorn or anger.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.'
She didn't "become like them" either... just sayin...

[Kathianne]

She didn't "become like them" either... just sayin...
and yet, there are few pedophiles that weren't abused themselves. It's never 'them.'

I can't stop your feelings about what I write, that's not within my powers.

[SassyLady]

On all you've written, I agree. I especially agree about your mom, that is horrendous.

That sort of experience, well the words are just not there, but unforgettable and life altering. At the same time, obviously you did not allow it to consume 'you.' The focus is on the perp and the enabler. I've no doubt you were hyper aware of adults, especially men around your children and now grandchildren.

I'm referring to people that do not come to that level, indeed, they are not worthy of the time and effort to keep them in mind. They may be a 'friend' that betrays in some way; a boss that is unreasonable or threatened; an ex, who one no longer must deal with, those types.

I certainly think being obsessed with someone we disagree with, no matter how strongly the disagreement is, wastes our time and in my case at least, raises my blood pressure to unmanageable levels. That is hurting me, not the object of my scorn or anger.

Yes, I've actually been diagnosed with PTSD and hypervigilance from the abuse. Always watching interactions between children and adults.

Also have participated on panels to educate the irrevocable harm sexual abuse can cause. Not everyone has the luxury of forgetting the abuse.

[Kathianne]

Yes, I've actually been diagnosed with PTSD and hypervigilance from the abuse. Always watching interactions between children and adults.

Also have participated on panels to educate the irrevocable harm sexual abuse can cause. Not everyone has the luxury of forgetting the abuse.

I can understand the PTSD, my niece and nephew were abused as children, by a relative on the mom's side. Even with immediate therapy and good support to get him prosecuted and incarcerated, the kids are also hyper vigilant about their own children. That can't be forgotten.

I think it's great that you turned this experience into helping others, that's without the best way to regain some measure of control.

[SassyLady]

I can understand the PTSD, my niece and nephew were abused as children, by a relative on the mom's side. Even with immediate therapy and good support to get him prosecuted and incarcerated, the kids are also hyper vigilant about their own children. That can't be forgotten.

I think it's great that you turned this experience into helping others, that's without the best way to regain some measure of control.

I hated them for a long time ... and then one day I realized they were taking up too much of my thoughts and emotions and decided to focus on my life to move forward.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

and yet, there are few pedophiles that weren't abused themselves. It's never 'them.'

I can't stop your feelings about what I write, that's not within my powers.
I'm just doing my best to interpret what you say.

[Kathianne]

I'm just doing my best to interpret what you say.
Interpret away, I told you it had nothing to do with any person or political viewpoint in particular.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

Interpret away, I told you it had nothing to do with any person or political viewpoint in particular.
I know what you told me, that's what I'm saying...

[SassyLady]

:dunno:

You guys are confusing me.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

:dunno:

You guys are confusing me.
Yeah... you and me both...

[gabosaurus]

Right or wrong, I'll leave that to God.

What would you know about God? You obviously don't follow him or believe in His word. Your ideas are totally contrary to the Word of God. God said "I am the God of all people." There were no exceptions for race, creed or ideals. A morally bankrupt bigot like yourself can not claim to follow God.

[Kathianne]

I hated them for a long time ... and then one day I realized they were taking up too much of my thoughts and emotions and decided to focus on my life to move forward.

Yeah, that was my point. You adapted and were able to 'move on,' yeah with PTSD and hypervigilence, but nevertheless, move on. Some are stuck, some become abusers. I'm glad you moved on. You have wonderful friends and a great family. You have a life and do good, not bad. That is more than just surviving.

[darin]

What would you know about God? You obviously don't follow him or believe in His word. Your ideas are totally contrary to the Word of God. God said "I am the God of all people." There were no exceptions for race, creed or ideals. A morally bankrupt bigot like yourself can not claim to follow God.


Rich coming from one of the biggest liars, fakes, phonies, offensive posters on the board.

You're the 'asshole' the vid refers too.

[High_Plains_Drifter]

What would you know about God? You obviously don't follow him or believe in His word. Your ideas are totally contrary to the Word of God. God said "I am the God of all people." There were no exceptions for race, creed or ideals. A morally bankrupt bigot like yourself can not claim to follow God.
I don't know how a person like you can live with them self. You have the morals of a PIG and the insight of a sack of PISS. You don't know me or God or what I believe, yet you vomit up this vile pap like you just ate a four course meal of DOG SHIT. That's the problem with you democrat trash, you think YOU are the standard to which EVERYONE must live, but YOUR standard is KILLING THE UNBORN, ADORING SEXUAL PERVERTS and PUNISHING CHRISTIANS for their beliefs, and you have the GALL to lecture ME about GOD and MORALITY? Evidently PATRIOTISM is what you REALLY abhor. You hate VETERANS, THE AMERICAN FLAG, the MILITARY and ANYTHING ELSE that you democrat trash see as PRO AMERICAN. Ya... what you were taught in SCHOOL, AYE? In your radical leftist democrat brain washing center.

You have to be the most VILE woman I have ever met on the internet. You get BANNED and then jump right back on and talk the most INSULTING TRASH you can VOMIT UP all right over again.

Fuck off and die, BITCH.

[gabosaurus]

I don't know how a person like you can live with them self...

I thought you were leaving the board? So much for your integrity. :rolleyes:

[gabosaurus]

Rich coming from one of the biggest liars, fakes, phonies, offensive posters on the board.

You're the 'asshole' the vid refers too.

Big words from a drunken old fool. The military exiled you to eastern Europe for a reason.

[Gunny]

I'm going to say this once. IF I have to start playing moderator because some people cannot keep their hostility and hatred contained in the thread y'all already ruined in the Cage, I'm going to start thread banning people. You're not going to wreck this board dragging your hatred and hostility from thread to thread. This isn't your private battleground.

If you have a problem with it, contact an admin.

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

Some things are unforgivable. If not forgiving the person who molested me and my siblings mean I will have a dark spot on my soul, so be it.

If any person had molested one of my children , you guys would not know me as a member here- because I would have beaten that guy to death and be in prison right now! Yes my friend, some things are unforgivable.
Child molestation is one of those things in my book.
At 15 years old, its one thing to have sex with a 13/14 year old girl, but to rape a little 6 year old girl!!!
No, that to me is utterly and absolutely unforgivable.
I truly despise and dearly hate child molesters. They should be put to death, IMHO.
I ONCE DATED A BEAUTIFUL LADY BACK IN THE EARLY 70'S, THAT TOLD ME HOW ONE OF HER MOTHER'S BOYFRIENDS ( SOME BASTARD NAMED BO) WOULD DO THINGS TO HER WHEN SHE WAS JUST 9 OR 10..
I always wanted to find and beat that bastard half to death but that all happened back many years before, when they lived in Cali or Nevada, if memory serves me well on it .-Tyr

[Gunny]

If any person had molested one of my children , you guys would not know me as a member here- because I would have beaten that guy to death and be in prison right now! Yes my friend, some things are unforgivable.
Child molestation is one of those things in my book.
At 15 years old, its one thing to have sex with a 13/14 year old girl, but to rape a little 6 year old girl!!!
No, that to me is utterly and absolutely unforgivable.
I truly despise and dearly hate child molesters. They should be put to death, IMHO.
I ONCE DATED A BEAUTIFUL LADY BACK IN THE EARLY 70'S, THAT TOLD ME HOW ONE OF HER MOTHER'S BOYFRIENDS ( SOME BASTARD NAMED BO) WOULD DO THINGS TO HER WHEN SHE WAS JUST 9 OR 10..
I always wanted to find and beat that bastard half to death but that all happened back many years before, when they lived in Cali or Nevada, if memory serves me well on it .-TyrI used to think like that. Now think about what you just said. You'd be in prison. Out of circulation. No good to your daughter nor anyone else. What happens next time she needs protecting and you're in the slam?

I'm not saying forgive or forget. You just need a better plan. :)

[Black Diamond]

Big words from a drunken old fool. The military exiled you to eastern Europe for a reason.
You get banned and come back and do it again. That's funny. :laugh:

[SassyLady]

Big words from a drunken old fool. The military exiled you to eastern Europe for a reason.

:believecrap: