Grow your OWN Breasts, MEN! :)

[darin]

WOOHOOO :)

Oils in shampoos, lotions tied to boys' breast growth

BOSTON, Massachusetts (AP) -- Lavender and tea tree oils found in some shampoos, soaps and lotions can temporarily leave boys with enlarged breasts in rare cases, apparently by disrupting their hormonal balance, a preliminary study suggests.

While advising parents to consider the possible risk, several hormone experts emphasized that the problem appears to happen infrequently and clears up when the oils are no longer used. None of those interviewed called for a ban on sales.

The study reported on the condition, gynecomastia, in three boys ages 4, 7 and 10. They all went back to normal when they stopped using skin lotions, hair gel, shampoo or soap with the natural oils.

It's unclear how often this problem might crop up in other young children.

These plant oils, sometimes called "essential oils," are added to many health-care products, usually for their scent. The oils are sometimes found in other household products or sold in purer forms. Tea tree oil is sometimes used in shampoos for head lice.

The suspected effect in this study is attributed to a chemical within the oils that the body processes as it does estrogen, the female hormone that promotes breast growth.

The findings were being reported Thursday in the New England Journal of Medicine. The federally funded study came out of the University of Colorado and the environmental health branch of the National Institutes of Health. The findings were first released last year at a science meeting.

The three boys were brought to their doctors with overdeveloped breasts that looked like those of girls in early puberty. They were sore in one case. For each boy, doctors could tie the problem only to their use over several months of the natural-oil products.

The researchers suspected that the oils might be upsetting the boys' hormonal balance. So they did a series of laboratory tests to check how these oils work within human cells. The oils appeared to mimic estrogen and block the male hormone androgen.

On product labels, the oils sometimes are listed by their scientific names: Lavandula angustifolia (lavender oil) and Melaleuca alternifolia (tea tree oil). Such products do not require government approval to be sold unless they make specific health claims.

Marijuana and soy products also have been linked to gynecomastia.

More:
http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/01/31/shampoos.breast.growth.ap/

[jillian]

Kind of like making your own toys. :)

[Mr. P]

Kind of like making your own toys. :)

:no: :no: :no: toys! They'll make ya go blind and is against......well you know.:)

[avatar4321]

Cant i do this just by eating alot of twinkies?

[The ClayTaurus]

Cant i do this just by eating alot of twinkies?The quality suffers.

[Pale Rider]

Cant i do this just by eating alot of twinkies?

If you compliment that diet with Bon-Bons and Ho-Hos, yes, you can.

[5stringJeff]

The real story here, I think, is that you should make sure that your wives all use as many essential oils, lavender, etc. products as possible.

[Roomy]

I would rather grow my own vagina so I could go fuck myself when told to:D

[Hobbit]

I kept warning people that those things would make you all girly, but would they EVER listen?

[darin]

I kept warning people that those things would make you all girly, but would they EVER listen?

I suspect a surge in MIATA sales. :)

[Mr. P]

I kept warning people that those things would make you all girly, but would they EVER listen?

You know 'girly' men, besides dmp? :laugh:

[Hobbit]

You know 'girly' men, besides dmp? :laugh:

Regretably, yes. My hope is that by being around such a vast array of studliness, their testosterone levels will rise to give them a fair shot against me in the dating game. So far, I've had some successes. My greatest one was with a guy trying to keep his girlfriend from breaking up with him. He was doing the girly thing by smothering her with affection, which, of course, drove her further away. I told him to stop being a wuss. He knew she was going to break up with him, so he needed to do the manly thing and break up with her first. This both catches her off guard and avoids the stigma that comes with being the target, rather than the cause, of a break up. It worked. A few weeks later, she approached him, apologized for whatever it was she did that drove him away, and they got back together. Having had a manliness increase, he didn't make the mistakes that turned her off the first time around, and now they're engaged.

The irony of the situation is that I tend to collect the most phone numbers, but I've never really had a girlfriend. The formerly girly men around me, though, are mostly married or engaged.

[darin]

I think women want men. Not these metrosexual pukes or the idiots we see (mostly white males) on Sitcoms.

[Hobbit]

I think women want men. Not these metrosexual pukes or the idiots we see (mostly white males) on Sitcoms.

Gag me with a spoon. I eat red meat, shoot things, am covered in body hair, and I'm arrogant as hell to boot (though I try to make sure I'm still capable of humility when it's required). You can tell me all you want about being sensitive and caring about your appearance, but I'm the one with the phone numbers of the ones who think you're a 'nice guy.'

[darin]

Gag me with a spoon. I eat red meat, shoot things, am covered in body hair, and I'm arrogant as hell to boot (though I try to make sure I'm still capable of humility when it's required). You can tell me all you want about being sensitive and caring about your appearance, but I'm the one with the phone numbers of the ones who think you're a 'nice guy.'

Hobbit = http://i45.photobucket.com/albums/f61/spyns/Man-O-Lantern.jpg

????

:D

[Hagbard Celine]

Gag me with a spoon. I eat red meat, shoot things, am covered in body hair, and I'm arrogant as hell to boot (though I try to make sure I'm still capable of humility when it's required). You can tell me all you want about being sensitive and caring about your appearance, but I'm the one with the phone numbers of the ones who think you're a 'nice guy.'

C'mon man you gotta come outta da closet! :laugh:

[Mr. P]

C'mon man you gotta come outta da closet! :laugh:

Hey KID! Nice to see ya..now that's your corner over there, sit down an stfu. :D

[The ClayTaurus]

Gag me with a spoon. I eat red meat, shoot things, am covered in body hair, and I'm arrogant as hell to boot (though I try to make sure I'm still capable of humility when it's required). You can tell me all you want about being sensitive and caring about your appearance, but I'm the one with the phone numbers of the ones who think you're a 'nice guy.'All those phone numbers and no action. Phone numbers mean nothing unless you use them. ;)

[Hagbard Celine]

Hey KID! Nice to see ya..now that's your corner over there, sit down an stfu. :D

Señior P! We meet again for the first time for the last time.

[Hobbit]

All those phone numbers and no action. Phone numbers mean nothing unless you use them. ;)

I'm a reserved man of discriminating tastes, and one who is also constantly looking past the immediate thrill of bedding a hot woman to the life I hope to live with a loving wife in a stable family.

Besides, the fact that I'm not only not trying to get into women's pants but that I'm actively trying to keep them out of my pants makes women want me more.

[Nienna]

I'm a reserved man of discriminating tastes, and one who is also constantly looking past the immediate thrill of bedding a hot woman to the life I hope to live with a loving wife in a stable family.

Besides, the fact that I'm not only not trying to get into women's pants but that I'm actively trying to keep them out of my pants makes women want me more.

Most likely the desire to be "THE ONE" who is woman enough to catch you, mixed with admiration of your strength in withholding.

[The ClayTaurus]

I'm a reserved man of discriminating tastes, and one who is also constantly looking past the immediate thrill of bedding a hot woman to the life I hope to live with a loving wife in a stable family.

Besides, the fact that I'm not only not trying to get into women's pants but that I'm actively trying to keep them out of my pants makes women want me more.Ya know, you can go on dates without sex. I know it's rare these days, but it does happen.

[Hagbard Celine]

Most likely the desire to be "THE ONE" who is woman enough to catch you, mixed with admiration of your strength in withholding.

I don't know, it's more likely that it's the body hair coupled with the Gandolf posters.

[Hobbit]

Ya know, you can go on dates without sex. I know it's rare these days, but it does happen.

And I have. I never said I'd never been on a date, just that I'd never had a girlfriend.

Oh, and no Gandalf posters. Two University of Arkansas posters, a picture of the first space shuttle 'tailcone off' flight, a picture of the Earth from the moon, and a Chinese painting.

[darin]

and a Chinese painting...

....OF Gandalf...

:p

:D

[Mr. P]

And I have. I never said I'd never been on a date, just that I'd never had a girlfriend.

Oh, and no Gandalf posters. Two University of Arkansas posters, a picture of the first space shuttle 'tailcone off' flight, a picture of the Earth from the moon, and a Chinese painting.

You NEED to get laid, kid!! :wink2:

[Nienna]

I don't know, it's more likely that it's the body hair coupled with the Gandolf posters.

That would do it for me... LOTR Kicks booty, and I love a fuzzy man! :)

[Gaffer]

Anyone that likes LOTR is fine by me.

[Hobbit]

You NEED to get laid, kid!! :wink2:

No I don't. While sexual intercourse is widely believed to be maturing and relaxing, one look at your average, oversexed frat boy will disprove the maturation thing and any relaxative effects will be offset by the emotional issues that accompany extramarital sex. I've never met anybody who regretted waiting.

[manu1959]

No I don't. While sexual intercourse is widely believed to be maturing and relaxing, one look at your average, oversexed frat boy will disprove the maturation thing and any relaxative effects will be offset by the emotional issues that accompany extramarital sex. I've never met anybody who regretted waiting.


this must be the same 1% that calims not to rub one out.....

oh and dating without sex is like showering without water.....

[jillian]

No I don't. While sexual intercourse is widely believed to be maturing and relaxing, one look at your average, oversexed frat boy will disprove the maturation thing and any relaxative effects will be offset by the emotional issues that accompany extramarital sex. I've never met anybody who regretted waiting.

You talk to the people who didn't? I'm not criticizing. I don't agree, but I wouldn't presume to tell you you're making a mistake. But what happens if your dream person and you don't work on a physical level?

[manu1959]

You talk to the people who didn't? I'm not criticizing. I don't agree, but I wouldn't presume to tell you you're making a mistake. But what happens if your dream person and you don't work on a physical level?

that is where oh shit...porn and hookers come into play

[darin]

My wife didn't regret waiting. I regret NOT waiting.

[manu1959]

My wife didn't regret waiting. I regret NOT waiting.

your wife is hot ...i would have done her sooner....wait that is not what you meant huh?

[jillian]

that is where oh shit...porn and hookers come into play

I wouldn't buy a car I didn't test drive and I only have to be stuck with my car for three years. :dunno:

[darin]

I wouldn't buy a car I didn't test drive and I only have to be stuck with my car for three years. :dunno:

That is aboslutely the worst, most shallow, horrible hedonistic, selfish BS comparison I've seen.

[jillian]

That is aboslutely the worst, most shallow, horrible hedonistic, selfish BS comparison I've seen.

You think if the physical is bad the relationship is going to be good?

[manu1959]

That is aboslutely the worst, most shallow, horrible hedonistic, selfish BS comparison I've seen.

how about this....i ain't about to spend the rest of my life with someone that i am not 100% SURE can curl my toes and make me arch my back

[Hobbit]

You talk to the people who didn't? I'm not criticizing. I don't agree, but I wouldn't presume to tell you you're making a mistake. But what happens if your dream person and you don't work on a physical level?

I have talked to the people who didn't wait. The majority of younger ones tell me to sow my wild oats while I can. The majority of older ones who don't encourage me to wait seem to have no problem being in their 3rd marriages.


I wouldn't buy a car I didn't test drive and I only have to be stuck with my car for three years.

The analogy seems fine if you're the driver, but it sucks if you're the car.

As far as being 'physically compatible,' there's nothing to compare to if you wait. If you only have sex with one person, it'll be the best sex you'll ever have.

[manu1959]

I have talked to the people who didn't wait. The majority of younger ones tell me to sow my wild oats while I can. The majority of older ones who don't encourage me to wait seem to have no problem being in their 3rd marriages.

The analogy seems fine if you're the driver, but it sucks if you're the car.

As far as being 'physically compatible,' there's nothing to compare to if you wait. If you only have sex with one person, it'll be the best sex you'll ever have.

every person is different....i drilled everthing that moved when i was young....sometimes three in a day...sometimes two in the room at the same time.....that is me.....for me...good thin that is done and i am with my wife and two kids and i am done with that.....i know people that were the opposite of me and have now bolted their spouse and family because they did not do what i did....

all i can tell you is....live your life as you see fit and don't listen to anyone else......in which case you will need to ignor me as well

[jillian]

I have talked to the people who didn't wait. The majority of younger ones tell me to sow my wild oats while I can. The majority of older ones who don't encourage me to wait seem to have no problem being in their 3rd marriages.

If you look at the stats, there is really no difference in divorce rates.


The analogy seems fine if you're the driver, but it sucks if you're the car.

But who's the driver who's the car? You're both drivers/both cars.. .that's the point.


As far as being 'physically compatible,' there's nothing to compare to if you wait. If you only have sex with one person, it'll be the best sex you'll ever have.

So if you don't know what you're missing, it won't matter to you? I thikn your intentions are so very good. But I'm here to tell you that if something is missing, you're going to know it anyway... regardless of whether you had 1, 10 or 100 partners.

No one is saying go out and be a skank... I just think that making a life decision but not knowing how you relate in one of the most basic areas of a relationship makes no sense. Before you choose the person you're with, you're going to find out if your socially compatible, religiously compatible, morally compatible. You'll find out if you have the same ideas about children and family. Yet you want to leave the most intimate part of your life to serendipity.

[manu1959]

If you look at the stats, there is really no difference in divorce rates.
But who's the driver who's the car? You're both drivers/both cars.. .that's the point.

So if you don't know what you're missing, it won't matter to you? I thikn your intentions are so very good. But I'm here to tell you that if something is missing, you're going to know it anyway... regardless of whether you had 1, 10 or 100 partners.

No one is saying go out and be a skank... I just think that making a life decision but not knowing how you relate in one of the most basic areas of a relationship makes no sense. Before you choose the person you're with, you're going to find out if your socially compatible, religiously compatible, morally compatible. You'll find out if you have the same ideas about children and family. Yet you want to leave the most intimate part of your life to serendipity.


all true..... but if it is the blind leading the blind....then crappy sex is brilliant sex...no one will be the wiser....

[jillian]

all true..... but if it is the blind leading the blind....then crappy sex is brilliant sex...no one will be the wiser....

Hope you're right for his sake. His intentions are good.

[Hobbit]

Just out of curiosity, without getting too graphic, what do you think will be missing from my sex life if I choose to only ever have sex with my wife?

[jillian]

Just out of curiosity, without getting too graphic, what do you think will be missing from my sex life if I choose to only ever have sex with my wife?

Honest answer. Might be nothing. Might be never having the person who makes your toes curl.

[Hobbit]

Honest answer. Might be nothing. Might be never having the person who makes your toes curl.

I have yet to find a pair of virgins who got married and became unsatisfied with their sex lives, just broken engagements over 'sexual compatibility.'

On the other hand, if I choose to have sex before marriage, what is left to save for my wife? What, besides a piece of paper and what amounts to a flimsy promise in these days of no-fault divorce is there to seperate her from whatever other girls I've gotten intimate with? Then there's the emotional damage associated with seperating from somebody you've had sex with. Anybody who can get that intimate with another human being and the just forget that person later in life is either cold, amnesiac, or lying.

[jillian]

I have yet to find a pair of virgins who got married and became unsatisfied with their sex lives, just broken engagements over 'sexual compatibility.'

On the other hand, if I choose to have sex before marriage, what is left to save for my wife? What, besides a piece of paper and what amounts to a flimsy promise in these days of no-fault divorce is there to seperate her from whatever other girls I've gotten intimate with? Then there's the emotional damage associated with seperating from somebody you've had sex with. Anybody who can get that intimate with another human being and the just forget that person later in life is either cold, amnesiac, or lying.

OK... I won't be glib in answering this. You're asking serious questions and they deserve serious response. I'll do my best.

I don't think I ever said you should forget anyone's name (although some people do). I do think life experience is important. I also think it's important to know, before you commit to a marriage, that you are, in fact, compatible. As for separating from someone you've had sex with. Yes, sometimes there's some hurt if it isn't a mutual separation. But I think certain things are worth a little risk of hurt. As for what's left for the person you're going to marry? Love, presumably. Commitment. Experience. Contentment, hopefully.

Also, I think there are certain rites of passage that are healthy. I think lust is healthy so long as no one is lying to anyone else or making promises they know they won't keep. Mostly, I think it's unhealthy to deny sexuality. That isn't to say go be with hundreds of women before you settle down or that you have to be promiscuous.

You know what, though? Whatever you do, you have to be comfortable with it and with yourself because if you're guilt-ridden or unhappy or not feeling good after, it won't be good for you anyway.

[darin]

Honest answer. Might be nothing. Might be never having the person who makes your toes curl.

Your answer is indicative of the Ego problems we create in society. It's ALL about ME. I wanna know the girl I'm going to have sex with will make ME feel good.

Look - as long as he focusses on making HER toes curl, he'll be fine.

[5stringJeff]

I don't buy "sexual compatibility." If two people love each other and are committed to each other, they will seek out ways to please their partners.

Hobbit, you are 100% right in what you're doing. I wish that I would have kept myself from premarital sex so that my wife was the 'only one.'

[The ClayTaurus]

I don't think waiting for marriage is a necessity, but I also don't think casual sex speaks highly of a person. And I do buy into sexual compatibility.

[Mr. P]

I don't buy "sexual compatibility." If two people love each other and are committed to each other, they will seek out ways to please their partners.

Hobbit, you are 100% right in what you're doing. I wish that I would have kept myself from premarital sex so that my wife was the 'only one.'

How about "sexual incompatibility"?

Say one loves sex and the other finds it the must vial discussing thing they can imagine possible and wants nothing to do with it (there are people like that). If that discovery is made after marriage nothing will hold it together for a life time. Not even GOD. IMO

[darin]

How about "sexual incompatibility"?

Say one loves sex and the other finds it the must vial discussing thing they can imagine possible and wants nothing to do with it (there are people like that). If that discovery is made after marriage nothing will hold it together for a life time. Not even GOD. IMO

Very few people go into a marriage - even virgins - with NO concept of sex and sexuality.

I agree with you - LOTS of sex - especially early in a marriage - forms foundations of the relationship to help the couple last.

Where either the man or the woman doesn't like sex (who we kidding here?) if the WOMAN doesn't like sex, she needs to seek therapy - she'd owe it to her husband.

Withholding Sex is THE SAME as adultry, IMO. Both can destroy a marriage and cause UNTOLD amounts of mental abuse upon the other partner.

But in the end, 'lack of sex' is not a jusifiable reason to divorce.

[5stringJeff]

One can discuss sex without having it, and thus solve those kinds of problems.

[darin]

AND when all else fails...BIITB.

[The ClayTaurus]

Very few people go into a marriage - even virgins - with NO concept of sex and sexuality.

I agree with you - LOTS of sex - especially early in a marriage - forms foundations of the relationship to help the couple last.

Where either the man or the woman doesn't like sex (who we kidding here?) if the WOMAN doesn't like sex, she needs to seek therapy - she'd owe it to her husband.

Withholding Sex is THE SAME as adultry, IMO. Both can destroy a marriage and cause UNTOLD amounts of mental abuse upon the other partner.

But in the end, 'lack of sex' is not a jusifiable reason to divorce.This is just me, but I do not want to be married to someone who needs therapy to want to have sex with me, owed or not.

[jillian]

One can discuss sex without having it, and thus solve those kinds of problems.

The problem is that real issues of enjoyment and frequency aren't something that can be discussed in the abstract. That's my only issue.

Again, one has to be comfortable in ones own skin. They have to be comfortable with their decisions. I'm not talking about promiscuity. I'm talking about sex within the confines of a relationship.

And, Darin, sex IS about enjoyment. It's okay to want to be pleased as well as please. That isn't selfish. It's healthy.

[darin]

This is just me, but I do not want to be married to someone who needs therapy to want to have sex with me, owed or not.

You are preaching to the choir, Clay.

[darin]

And, Darin, sex IS about enjoyment. It's okay to want to be pleased as well as please. That isn't selfish. It's healthy.

But that's not what you said. You said you want to make sure somebody 'makes your toes curl'. I'm saying that's a selfish reason. I suppose your premise is wrong. Sex isn't about Enjoyment. Sex is about bonding two bodies together to make one spirit/one flesh. Sex bonds a man and woman. Mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

If a man stops worrying about himself, and focusses ONLY on pleasing his woman, I GAIR-UHN-TEE he'll be pleased.

Often in life, when we stop worrying about what pleases US is when we get the most pleasure. Try it.

[Mr. P]

One can discuss sex without having it, and thus solve those kinds of problems.

No, there is still the unknown.

You can discuss skydiving too, but unless you have done it, how it is or would be is all speculation.

[Hobbit]

Well, sex is as important as anything else in a marriage, and must be discussed before marriage, but I still think that any non-physical problem that arises in a married couples' sex life is a symptom, not a condition. If somebody has issues with sex being vile, then a) I'm open enough about talking about sex that I think I'll figure that out before the wedding, and b) it is, once again, a symptom of a larger issue that needs to be resolved before entering a relationship as close as marriage.

None of these things is going to be solved by premarital sex.

[Nienna]

You think if the physical is bad the relationship is going to be good?

I think if the relationship is good, the physical takes care of itself, for the most part.

[The Slayer]

I am just wondering what makes marriage the binding contract to have sex? What is the difference between a long term, loving, commited relationship with sex and a marriage with sex?
Sex is an individuals choice, but what is it about marriage that makes those that wait for it, seem so much more pure?
I am not married obviously but have no problems with premarital sex. I am not against waiting either. I am just curious as to what the difference between rings and a piece of paper, over a serious commitment are?

[The ClayTaurus]

I am just wondering what makes marriage the binding contract to have sex? What is the difference between a long term, loving, commited relationship with sex and a marriage with sex?
Sex is an individuals choice, but what is it about marriage that makes those that wait for it, seem so much more pure?
I am not married obviously but have no problems with premarital sex. I am not against waiting either. I am just curious as to what the difference between rings and a piece of paper, over a serious commitment are?Some seem to need it as an incentive to get married. Or rather some want it as an incentive to get married.

I'm with you though, long-term committed relationships are a-ok for sex in my book.

[jillian]

I think if the relationship is good, the physical takes care of itself, for the most part.

I think that's wishful thinking.

[Mr. P]

Well, sex is as important as anything else in a marriage, and must be discussed before marriage, but I still think that any non-physical problem that arises in a married couples' sex life is a symptom, not a condition. If somebody has issues with sex being vile, then a) I'm open enough about talking about sex that I think I'll figure that out before the wedding, and b) it is, once again, a symptom of a larger issue that needs to be resolved before entering a relationship as close as marriage.

None of these things is going to be solved by premarital sex.

Problem is, without premarital you'll never know about Aor B.

[darin]

I think that's wishful thinking.

Your marriage could be a LOT better, then. :)

[jillian]

Your marriage could be a LOT better, then. :)

Funny... I knew what I bought, love. :thumb:

[Hobbit]

Problem is, without premarital you'll never know about Aor B.

I think a person who is disgusted by sex might just have enough of an imagination to know that without actually trying to have sex. Just a thought.


I am just wondering what makes marriage the binding contract to have sex? What is the difference between a long term, loving, commited relationship with sex and a marriage with sex?
Sex is an individuals choice, but what is it about marriage that makes those that wait for it, seem so much more pure?
I am not married obviously but have no problems with premarital sex. I am not against waiting either. I am just curious as to what the difference between rings and a piece of paper, over a serious commitment are?

Because until no-fault divorce, a marriage was an oath upon one's highest honors that this was the only person that you would ever be with. A 'committed, long-term relationship' just doesn't have the finality of 'until death do us part.' The idea of waiting until marriage is the idea that you'll only ever have sex with that one person.

[The ClayTaurus]

Because until no-fault divorce, a marriage was an oath upon one's highest honors that this was the only person that you would ever be with.It still is to some of us, the sex part aside.

[The Slayer]

I think a person who is disgusted by sex might just have enough of an imagination to know that without actually trying to have sex. Just a thought.



Because until no-fault divorce, a marriage was an oath upon one's highest honors that this was the only person that you would ever be with. A 'committed, long-term relationship' just doesn't have the finality of 'until death do us part.' The idea of waiting until marriage is the idea that you'll only ever have sex with that one person.

I appriciate your honesty in your views. I do believe a commited long term relationship can be a binding "till death do us part thing" that of course is my view. I cannot say that they would be the only person I have been with, but even married I would be of unpure standards. I should warn you all right now I have no shame..
I respect those that choose to wait and feel that marriage is the only way to solidify a commitment. I just cannot grasp the ideals that come with that train of thought. I am trying to see it through your eyes and find it rather sweet and old fashioned. I just dont agree, I dont see mariage as a real commitment anymore and think it is a waste of money and an excuse to act any way you want once you have found "the one".

[Hobbit]

It still is to some of us, the sex part aside.

Yes, I know, but I included the part about no-fault divorce to remind people why some people no longer valued marriage as they once did.

As for the sex, sex is the absolute most intimate single act a man and a woman can enjoy together. I would rather save that act for my one and only, rather than my 4 or 5 or however many seem to be the magic number.

BTW, I see a lot of people walking a thin line indicating that it is better to have sex before marriage than not, yet also claiming that having too much pre-marital sex isn't good at all. Where's the line?

[Hobbit]

I appriciate your honesty in your views. I do believe a commited long term relationship can be a binding "till death do us part thing" that of course is my view. I cannot say that they would be the only person I have been with, but even married I would be of unpure standards. I should warn you all right now I have no shame..
I respect those that choose to wait and feel that marriage is the only way to solidify a commitment. I just cannot grasp the ideals that come with that train of thought. I am trying to see it through your eyes and find it rather sweet and old fashioned. I just dont agree, I dont see mariage as a real commitment anymore and think it is a waste of money and an excuse to act any way you want once you have found "the one".

Thanks to new legal and cultural views regarding divorce, marriage is as much committment as the couple makes it. When I marry, it will be a lifetime committment before God and I will not lightly throw it aside. While many people fail to see purpose in the ceremony, everything is symbolic of something special, and nothing has quite the finality of a wedding, if taken seriously.

[The Slayer]

I repsect that and I wish you the best in that journey.
I have no desire to marry, and I am good with that.

As far as the fine line you are talking about, I think that is an individual thing as well as a gender based line. I have no qualms about the men I have slept with in my past. I have no qualms about the amount of women my "commited" boyfriend has had in the past. It is not a specific number that draws the line of slut, whore, or whatever you want to label it. People do what is right for them. You may not agree with it but hey they are born of free will and no one has a right to pass judgement on choices if I remember correctly.

[Mr. P]

I think a person who is disgusted by sex might just have enough of an imagination to know that without actually trying to have sex. Just a thought.

....


But that's unrealistic. How would one know if they like something without trying it first?

We can compare this to, ‘I just don’t like it” with food we have never had. We can all eat different things and be fine. But when we talk of a core element in a marriage, a lifelong relationship, where we must share the same emotional food, it just doesn’t work that way.

[The ClayTaurus]

Yes, I know, but I included the part about no-fault divorce to remind people why some people no longer valued marriage as they once did.

As for the sex, sex is the absolute most intimate single act a man and a woman can enjoy together. I would rather save that act for my one and only, rather than my 4 or 5 or however many seem to be the magic number.

BTW, I see a lot of people walking a thin line indicating that it is better to have sex before marriage than not, yet also claiming that having too much pre-marital sex isn't good at all. Where's the line?The line is sex being meaningless. There's a difference between fucking and making love.

[The ClayTaurus]

Thanks to new legal and cultural views regarding divorce, marriage is as much committment as the couple makes it.I'm almost a fan of this. To me, it means more to me knowing it'd be just as easy to have some worthless, three divorce life, but instead being faithful and working on your marriage, knowing you didn't settle for someone.

If there's a societal pressure to stay married, you'll never really know. IMO.

[Mr. P]

...marriage is as much committment as the couple makes it. ....

That's the way it's always been, Kid. Things change, people change, shit happens.

[manu1959]

There's a difference between fucking and making love.

yes there is ....... :p

[Abbey Marie]

I don't know, it's more likely that it's the body hair coupled with the Gandolf posters.

:lol: You made me almost spit out my coffee.

[Abbey Marie]

all i can tell you is....live your life as you see fit and don't listen to anyone else...


Best advice in the thread, Hobbitt. But I sense that you already know that. :)

[manu1959]

Best advice in the thread, Hobbitt. But I sense that you already know that. :)

thank you

[darin]

As for the sex, sex is the absolute most intimate single act a man and a woman can enjoy together. I would rather save that act for my one and only, rather than my 4 or 5 or however many seem to be the magic number.


I'll have to beg to differ. Sex isn't the most intimate thing for me - the 'afterglow' however, tends to be.

And 4 or 5? Lord - that'd be a slow week!

:p