Why I vote Democrat

[tailfins]

This is a copy-and-paste job. If you don't like copy-and-paste, don't read it.

Why I vote Democrat
(comment by TheFallofAmerica on March 19, 2014)
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s okay if our federal government borrows $85 Billion every single month.
I vote Democrat because I care about the children … but saddling them with trillions of dollars of debt to pay for my bloated leftist government is okay.
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s better to pay billions of dollars to people who hate us rather than drill for our own oil, because it might upset some endangered beetle or gopher.
I vote Democrat because I believe it is okay if liberal activist judges rewrite the Constitution to suit some fringe kooks, who would otherwise never get their agenda past the voters.
I vote Democrat because I believe that corporate America should not be allowed to make profits for themselves or their shareholders. They need to break even and give the rest to the federal government for redistribution.
I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of babies being aborted, so long as we keep all of the murderers on death row alive.
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s okay if my Nobel Peace Prize winning President uses drones to assassinate people, as long as we don’t use torture.
I vote Democrat because I believe people, who can’t accurately tell us if it will rain on Friday, can predict the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Chevy Volt.
I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is not as important as preventing people from being offended.
I vote Democrat because I believe the oil companies’ profit of 3% on a gallon of gas is obscene, but the federal government taxing that same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t obscene.
I vote Democrat because I believe a moment of silent prayer at the beginning of the school day constitutes government indoctrination and an intrusion on parental authority ….. but sex education, condom distribution and multiculturalism are all values-neutral.
I vote Democrat because I agonize over threats to the natural environment from CO2, acid rain and toxic waste ….. but I am totally oblivious of the threats to our social environment from pornography, promiscuity and family dissolution.
I vote Democrat because I believe lazy, uneducated stoners should have just as big a say in running our country as entrepreneurs who risk everything and work 70 hours per week.
I vote Democrat because I don’t like guns ….. so no one else should be allowed to own one.
I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between welfare and the rise of illegitimacy.
I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between judicial leniency and surging crime rates.
I vote Democrat because I believe you don’t need an ID to vote but you do to buy beer.
I vote Democrat because I believe marriage is obsolete, except for homosexuals.
I vote Democrat because I think AIDS is spread by insufficient funding.
I vote Democrat because I think “fairness” is far more important than freedom.
I vote Democrat because I think an “equal outcome” is far more important than equal opportunity.
I vote democrat because I would rather hide in a class room while others fight for my freedom.
I vote democrat because I’m not smart enough to own a gun and I need someone else to protect me.
I vote democrat because I would rather have free stuff than freedom.
And lastly, I vote Democrat because I’m convinced that government programs are the solution to the human condition, NOT freedom.
Re-posted from BizPac Review

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

This is a copy-and-paste job. If you don't like copy-and-paste, don't read it.

Why I vote Democrat
(comment by TheFallofAmerica on March 19, 2014)
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s okay if our federal government borrows $85 Billion every single month.
I vote Democrat because I care about the children … but saddling them with trillions of dollars of debt to pay for my bloated leftist government is okay.
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s better to pay billions of dollars to people who hate us rather than drill for our own oil, because it might upset some endangered beetle or gopher.
I vote Democrat because I believe it is okay if liberal activist judges rewrite the Constitution to suit some fringe kooks, who would otherwise never get their agenda past the voters.
I vote Democrat because I believe that corporate America should not be allowed to make profits for themselves or their shareholders. They need to break even and give the rest to the federal government for redistribution.
I vote Democrat because I’m not concerned about millions of babies being aborted, so long as we keep all of the murderers on death row alive.
I vote Democrat because I believe it’s okay if my Nobel Peace Prize winning President uses drones to assassinate people, as long as we don’t use torture.
I vote Democrat because I believe people, who can’t accurately tell us if it will rain on Friday, can predict the polar ice caps will melt away in ten years if I don’t start driving a Chevy Volt.
I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is not as important as preventing people from being offended.
I vote Democrat because I believe the oil companies’ profit of 3% on a gallon of gas is obscene, but the federal government taxing that same gallon of gas at 15% isn’t obscene.
I vote Democrat because I believe a moment of silent prayer at the beginning of the school day constitutes government indoctrination and an intrusion on parental authority ….. but sex education, condom distribution and multiculturalism are all values-neutral.
I vote Democrat because I agonize over threats to the natural environment from CO2, acid rain and toxic waste ….. but I am totally oblivious of the threats to our social environment from pornography, promiscuity and family dissolution.
I vote Democrat because I believe lazy, uneducated stoners should have just as big a say in running our country as entrepreneurs who risk everything and work 70 hours per week.
I vote Democrat because I don’t like guns ….. so no one else should be allowed to own one.
I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between welfare and the rise of illegitimacy.
I vote Democrat because I see absolutely no correlation between judicial leniency and surging crime rates.
I vote Democrat because I believe you don’t need an ID to vote but you do to buy beer.
I vote Democrat because I believe marriage is obsolete, except for homosexuals.
I vote Democrat because I think AIDS is spread by insufficient funding.
I vote Democrat because I think “fairness” is far more important than freedom.
I vote Democrat because I think an “equal outcome” is far more important than equal opportunity.
I vote democrat because I would rather hide in a class room while others fight for my freedom.
I vote democrat because I’m not smart enough to own a gun and I need someone else to protect me.
I vote democrat because I would rather have free stuff than freedom.
And lastly, I vote Democrat because I’m convinced that government programs are the solution to the human condition, NOT freedom.
Re-posted from BizPac Review

Brilliant post and so damn true!!-Tyr

[red states rule]

This is a clasic and has been around for awhile. I case any of you never read this - please enjoy





Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffee pot with water to prepare his morning coffee. Joe can afford the coffee because corporate loving rich Republicans exported our jobs overseas with NAFTA and CAFTA.


With his first swallow of coffee, he takes his daily medication. His medications work because money-grubbing Republicans refuse to place price controls on drugs, thereby allowing pharmaceutical companies to earn enough money to pay for the extensive R&D and take the risks necessary to create miracle drugs. But the drugs still cost too much because government mandated health insurance has artificially increased the demand for medications with no one to police the prices, but that’s OK since Joe’s Bush-supporting bossman pays all but $10 of Joe's medications.


In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient, none of which are damaging to his skin because some animal-hating sadistic corporations paid some scientists to swab the shampoo in some poor rabbit’s eyes. Just for kicks.


Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. The air he breathes is clean because some dollar-worshipping conservative developers built some nice houses with pretty yards 15 miles from the industrial sector of the city, and Joe drives his comfortable and affordable “Japanese” car made in Georgia without the inflated cost of union labor, and Joe can stop on his way home to pick up a package of reasonably priced T-shirts at the evil Wal-Mart, instead of having to park his car and take a filthy subway to pay twice as much downtown.


Joe begins his work day. He has a good job with excellent pay, medical benefits, retirement, paid holidays and vacation because his parents instilled in him the value of hard work so he studied when he was in school and learned that he could get by just fine without relying on the government. Joe's employer pays these benefits because Joe's employer doesn't Joe’s a valuable employee and Joe’s employer doesn’t want him to go work for his competitor. If Joe is hurt on the job or becomes unemployed, he'll get another job pretty quick because he’s a self-starting go getter who has a lot of friends at church and from college that he can call to find more work.


It's noontime and Joe would need to make a bank deposit but doesn’t need to go to a bank because evil monopolist Bill Gates helped make computers useable to the general public and he can automatically pay bills thanks to the economies of scale of Bank of America or Wachovia installing the expensive equipment to allow Joe this convenience. While Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC, Joe doesn’t have to worry about Democrats in Congress pulling the rug out from under the real estate market again like they did in the 80s. At least Joe hopes they learned their lesson.


Joe pays a low rate mortgage because Americans voted for that war monger Ronald Reagan in 1980 and Bill Clinton had the good sense to reappoint Alan Greenspan. And Joe can afford a nicer home, not only just because of the low mortgage rates, but also because he gets to keep more of his hard earned money because Republican Presidents in the 1980s and in 2001 cut his taxes.


After work this evening, Joe plans to visit his father at his farm home in the country that Joe’s dad still owns because his landed-gentry Republican County Commissioners have refused to steal his land in the name of a higher tax base.


Joe gets in his car for the drive because the government added additional lanes to the local highways that people actually use instead of throwing money away on a regional rail system that studies project people would little use. Joe gets to his house in record time because death-loving Republicans allow you to go 65 and 70 mph, and you can because pollution loving Republicans don’t make you plug your car in overnight so you can drive for 2 hours at a maximum speed of 20 mph.


Joe arrives at his boyhood home. His was the third generation to live in the house, but he doesn’t because when his grandparents moved to the United States they learned to speak English and didn’t spend their time complaining about how the government wasn’t doing enough for them. The house didn't have electricity until some military-industrial power company plopped a big ol’ nuclear power plant over by the river.


Joe is happy to see his father, so they go to the local bar and enjoy a beer and a cigar, where Joe’s dad tells him that if the estate tax is repealed, Joe can keep the farm in the family for a fourth generation and won’t have to sell it to pay the taxes.


Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on NPR. The reporters keep telling stories about how bad corporations only care about profit and that higher taxes will allow the government to “invest” in our future. They don’t mention that the beloved Democrats have vilified the very people who have provided us jobs, good and services from their small businesses and big companies.


Joe agrees: "Those evil corporations don’t care about the little guy, all they want is to pay their executives huge salaries and steal oil from the middle east. Why can’t we be like Europe where we can work 30 hour weeks and get a month vacation? Bastard rich people only care about themselves."

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1464434/posts

[Neo]

Brilliant post and so damn true!!-Tyr

Absolutely concur mi Capitan'!

[Neo]

This is a clasic and has been around for awhile. I case any of you never read this - please enjoy
Just awesome!

[red states rule]

Here is another version of his life if Libs actually get everything they want

Enjoy




Joe gets up at 6 a.m. and fills his coffeepot with water to prepare his morning coffee. He can only afford to drink four ounces a day because his tree-hugging governor raised the sales tax for the fifth time in four years to pay for gov't run Daycare, the Playboy channel for incarcerated sex-offenders, free needle-exchange programs, social services for illegal aliens, and condom-vending machines in preschool.

But he savors every drop, for next year he'll only be permitted to buy decaffeinated coffee because FDA testing found that force-feeding lab rats 20 gallons of coffee per day raised their cancer rate by .0003% per thousand.

With his first swallow of water, he rations his daily intake of medication. He can't afford all his meds because some stupid commie liberal ambulance-chaser drove pharmaceutical costs through the roof with frivolous lawsuits.

His meds are subsidized by his employer's medical plan because some liberal closed shop union workers fought their employers in order to garnish employee wages so that Joe would labor under the illusion that someone else is picking up the tab when in fact his employer is reaching into Joe's own back pocket.

He prepares his morning breakfast, bacon and eggs. Joe's bacon is unsafe to eat because some girly-man liberal fought for limited liability laws so that if anyone dies of food poisoning, the meat packing industry will pay a fine and pass the cost on to the customer.

In the morning shower, Joe reaches for his shampoo. His bottle is properly labeled with each ingredient because some crybaby liberal thought that he was too stupid to know that imbibing a pint of shampoo might be harmful to his health.

Joe dresses, walks outside and takes a deep breath. Joe begins to cough, choke, and gasp for breath because some environmentalist wacko liberal fought for passage of the Kyoto treaty, allowing Third World countries to contaminate the world air supply with carbon monoxide.

Joe doesn't dare go out at night because some environmentalist wacko liberal lawmaker forbade the spraying or draining of malarial swamps.

Joe lost his first home to wildfire because some environmentalist wacko liberal lawmaker forbade the thinning old growth forestland.

His dad used to take the train to work. But when the Federal highway system destroyed our once-magnificent train system, Joe had to resort to the filthy, crime-ridden subway system because some fancy-pants liberal fought to disarm law-abiding citizens so that street gangs could mug commuters, then cop a plea based on post-traumatic slavery disorder.

Joe begins his workday. Joe's dad used to support his family at a middle class lifestyle on a single income. But it now takes two or three incomes to do the work of one because liberal bureaucrats drove up the cost of doing business through overregulation and usurious corporate taxation.

If Joe gets bored with his job, he can fake an injury and collect workman's comp., retiring to the slopes of Aspen to recuperate because some stupid liberal didn't think that employees might try to bilk the system.

It is noontime and Joe needs to make a bank deposit so he can pay some bills. Joe's deposit is federally insured by the FSLIC because some godless liberal thought that financial institutions should be able to defraud their customers and then file for bankruptcy, thereby shielding the pension and severance pay of board members while sticking the taxpayer with the tab.

Joe has to pay his federal student loan because some elitist liberal decided to subsidize college education so that universities, freed from competitive pressure, no longer had to keep tuition costs down.

Joe had the GPA and SAT scores to get into Harvard, but he had to settle for a community college because racial quotas kept him out while admitting inner city students who couldn't read or write, but had mastered multiple techniques of fitting a condom in high school sex-ed.

Joe is home from work. He plans to visit his father this evening at his farm home in the country. He gets in his car for the drive. He has to practice defensive driving because some America-hating liberal had alcoholism classified as a legally-protected disease and disability.

He arrives at his boyhood home. The countryside used to be a quiet, leisurely, pristine place to live until the Federal highway system and forced bussing overran the bucolic countryside with suburban sprawl as urbanites fled the cities.

His family used to live off the land, in harmony with nature, until some big-government liberal stuck his nose where it didn't belong and demanded rural electrification, powered by fossil fuel consumption.

He is happy to see his dad. Dad will be the last generation to retire on Social Security because some wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberals regularly raided the SS trust-fund to subsidize social programs, instead of allowing workers to invest their own earnings in compound interest-bearing accounts.

Joe's Dad was forced into early retirement, without a pension, because some environmentalist wacko liberal discovered a snail-darter in the cooling system of the local nuclear plant, where his dad used to work.

Joe's uncle used to be a cattle rancher until he was driven out of business because some environmentalist wacko liberal lawmaker kept him from shooting wolves that preyed on his livestock.

Joe's cousin used to work at the local lumber mill until he was laid off because some environmentalist wacko liberal discovered a spotted owl on timberland.

Joe's relatives used to receive assistance from the local chapter of the Salvation Army until it had to close its doors because some liberal civil libertarian sued it for refusing to offer domestic partnership benefits to all its employees.

Wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberals also invented a Constitutional right to an abortion, resulting in 45 million fewer workers to support the retirees.

In addition, wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberals promoted SS so that no able-bodied, adult child should ever be saddled with the onerous burden of caring for the elderly parents who devoted the best years of their lives caring for them when they were young and helpless.

Finally, wine-drinking, cheese-eating liberals lobbied for involuntary euthanasia so that burdensome parents can be put out of their children's misery.

As the day ends, Joe reflects on his nation, his liberties and his freedoms. He is free because conservative cold warriors kept commie lefty Liberals from unilaterally disarming America.

Joe resents having to be so dependent on gov't goods and services, but since he didn't ask for it, since--indeed--it was imposed on him anyway, against his will, and forcibly deducted from his hard-earned wages, the only way he can recoup a fraction of his losses is to play the hand he's been dealt--even if the deck is stacked against him.

Joe gets back in his car for the ride home, and turns on NPR. The radio host keeps saying that liberals are good and right-wingers are bad. He doesn't mention that the beloved liberals have fought for the infringement of every freedom that Joe's old man used to enjoy and take for granted.

http://triablogue.blogspot.com/2008/09/day-in-life-of-joe-democrat.html