First, very high, now very low

[jimnyc]

Such is the life of someone dealing with bipolar. I was on quite a high there for awhile. Waking up early, feeling creative, getting things done, wanting to talk with people, feeling encouraged...

I don't know of the non-stop snow which has now created a melting black mushland has set it off, but I've started to feel down, and then feeling tired and lethargic, depressed, not wanting to communicate...

The good news is that I recognize when both of these events started. I've tried to mark certain days to keep a tally of when these highs and lows come and how long they last. Also, with knowing, I always remind myself that the high is in my head and that I am NOT invincible - just as when I am at my lowest I remind myself that it's just my head/brain chemistry fucking with me. It seems that the more I recognize the comings and goings, the easier it's been to kinda deal with it.

And if I feel REALLY down, I toss a brown bag full of dog crap on my neighbors doorstep, light it on fire and then ring her doorbell. :)

[hjmick]

As the spouse of a person who suffers with mental illness, let me take this moment to mention that, as I'm sure you know Jim, you're not the only one dealing with your diagnosis. Speaking from experience, it's not easy on the family either.

Good luck to you man, it's not an easy road to travel.

[jafar00]

Jim, have you considered controlling bipolar with diet?

The Ketogenic diet (low carb high fat) has been used successfully to treat Epilepsy, MS, and Alzheimers. I have not seen any studies to show any effects of a Ketogenic diet on bipolar sufferers but there is some anecdotal evidence of it working mainly due to the changes in brain chemistry when running on ketone bodies.

Check it out and see your doctor for monitoring while you do it. It can't hurt and if it only levels you out a bit, it is still an improvement, and your levels of health generally will also be improved.

http://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/comments/z8tv7/ketogenic_diet_and_bipolar_disorder/

If you decide to give it a go, I am ready to give you a hand with it. I've been eating a ketogenic diet for nearly 18 months and I've lost a ton of weight as well as experiencing other improvements in my quality of life including a normalised lipid/cholesterol and blood sugar profile compared to before when I was pre-diabetic and one step away from being medicated for it.

[Abbey Marie]

Jim, your post made me want to mention two things that I often think about:

1. I believe most of us experience some form of this from time to time. It may not be severe in everyone, but we do share your feelings to various degrees.

2. I have known a few people in my lifetime who seem perpetually "upbeat". Nothing seems to get them down, and they just seem to see life in a positive light ALL THE TIME. These people are annoying as hell! "Sort of" kidding there, but more importantly, I came to understand that they just were blessed with better serotonin levels than the rest of us mere mortals. Nothing more than that. NO reason to think they are any better than the rest of us, or to envy them. In fact, they may be missing out on some depth and soul-searching that would probably be good for them. I'll bet our great writers and poets had low serotonin levels. :cool:

[logroller]

High/low...Highs cannot be without lows. Would if you could, forgo the high to feel less low?
Medicines exist which will do just that. If that's what you want, then so be it.

But whether or not you choose to go that path, and tempting though may be, don't dwell on how you feel now, nor covet how you once felt. Accept what you feel now as what it need be. Submit gracefully. To me, this is to be meek. For until you embrace lows as necessary you will not feel high again. No drug will mask the pain the way joy overpowers it.

You're in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be with you.

[Voted4Reagan]

We're going to have to send our special op's team in to cheer up Jimmy...

http://www.kochman.dk/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/swedish-bikini-team.jpg

[Jeff]

James I was at the Doc's the other day and they where concerned about weight loss ( I wasn't because I know it will all come back as soon as the weather breaks :laugh: ) seriously I explained to the Doc I did the same thing last year when I was locked up in the house all winter and he explained there actually is a disease ( some type of depression ) that had a name and all that many people get ever year ( he did say he doubted I had it but that it is a real thing, I had played it off as a joke ) So it will all be over soon Jim just keep thinking of the spring :thumb: Prescription by Doctor Jeff

[Abbey Marie]

James I was at the Doc's the other day and they where concerned about weight loss ( I wasn't because I know it will all come back as soon as the weather breaks :laugh: ) seriously I explained to the Doc I did the same thing last year when I was locked up in the house all winter and he explained there actually is a disease ( some type of depression ) that had a name and all that many people get ever year ( he did say he doubted I had it but that it is a real thing, I had played it off as a joke ) So it will all be over soon Jim just keep thinking of the spring :thumb: Prescription by Doctor Jeff

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)? So-called because people get depressed at the lack of sunlight in winter.

[jafar00]

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)? So-called because people get depressed at the lack of sunlight in winter.

That's the one. You can buy "sun" lamps to brighten up the house to help with that.

[jimnyc]

As the spouse of a person who suffers with mental illness, let me take this moment to mention that, as I'm sure you know Jim, you're not the only one dealing with your diagnosis. Speaking from experience, it's not easy on the family either.

Good luck to you man, it's not an easy road to travel.

There are a lot more people out there than most would imagine, just with bipolar alone. My wife doesn't really understand, no matter how much literature I stuff in front of her face. I don't know what's worse, dealing with it, or not understanding it when a loved one has it.


Jim, have you considered controlling bipolar with diet?

The Ketogenic diet (low carb high fat) has been used successfully to treat Epilepsy, MS, and Alzheimers. I have not seen any studies to show any effects of a Ketogenic diet on bipolar sufferers but there is some anecdotal evidence of it working mainly due to the changes in brain chemistry when running on ketone bodies.

Check it out and see your doctor for monitoring while you do it. It can't hurt and if it only levels you out a bit, it is still an improvement, and your levels of health generally will also be improved.

http://www.reddit.com/r/bipolar/comments/z8tv7/ketogenic_diet_and_bipolar_disorder/

If you decide to give it a go, I am ready to give you a hand with it. I've been eating a ketogenic diet for nearly 18 months and I've lost a ton of weight as well as experiencing other improvements in my quality of life including a normalised lipid/cholesterol and blood sugar profile compared to before when I was pre-diabetic and one step away from being medicated for it.

I honestly don't think I could handle another type of diet or restriction in my life. LOL High cholesterol, out of shape, eat chicken, low calories, eat carbs, don't eat carbs, kill the bread, never drink soda.

I DO appreciate ya even bringing this up though, as truth be told, I had no idea that diet could have that kind of impact, so it gives me some research.


Jim, your post made me want to mention two things that I often think about:

1. I believe most of us experience some form of this from time to time. It may not be severe in everyone, but we do share your feelings to various degrees.

2. I have known a few people in my lifetime who seem perpetually "upbeat". Nothing seems to get them down, and they just seem to see life in a positive light ALL THE TIME. These people are annoying as hell! "Sort of" kidding there, but more importantly, I came to understand that they just were blessed with better serotonin levels than the rest of us mere mortals. Nothing more than that. NO reason to think they are any better than the rest of us, or to envy them. In fact, they may be missing out on some depth and soul-searching that would probably be good for them. I'll bet our great writers and poets had low serotonin levels. :cool:

Kinda weird, but it's like a built in drug system. Similar to our body with dopamine.


High/low...Highs cannot be without lows. Would if you could, forgo the high to feel less low?
Medicines exist which will do just that. If that's what you want, then so be it.

But whether or not you choose to go that path, and tempting though may be, don't dwell on how you feel now, nor covet how you once felt. Accept what you feel now as what it need be. Submit gracefully. To me, this is to be meek. For until you embrace lows as necessary you will not feel high again. No drug will mask the pain the way joy overpowers it.

You're in my thoughts and prayers. Peace be with you.

True enough! My doctor stated as much during our last appointment when I explained to him that I was on a 'high period'. He was hesitant to counter it with a medication adjustment, as he as well believed there were benefits tied behind it, and that so long as it wasn't causing any issues.... Quite frankly, I'd like to be off of ALL the medications, and have stated as much to my doctor, but he said a certain balance was necessary. In other words, you're 100% correct, take the lows to get the high periods. I wouldn't forgo, I think it's worth it. But I do still have to take some medication, to keep the chemistry in line I suppose. I suppose I also have long term concerns about being on medications too, but how do you fight that anyway if the medicine is necessary?


James I was at the Doc's the other day and they where concerned about weight loss ( I wasn't because I know it will all come back as soon as the weather breaks :laugh: ) seriously I explained to the Doc I did the same thing last year when I was locked up in the house all winter and he explained there actually is a disease ( some type of depression ) that had a name and all that many people get ever year ( he did say he doubted I had it but that it is a real thing, I had played it off as a joke ) So it will all be over soon Jim just keep thinking of the spring :thumb: Prescription by Doctor Jeff


Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)? So-called because people get depressed at the lack of sunlight in winter.

Yep Jeff, you're correct, and Abbey got the specifics. People that already have depression, bipolar and such are susceptible to be even more depressed when it's gloomy for an extended period, in which it has. But hell, who wouldn't feel crappy with extended winters and darker skies? I'd be happy if winter lasted like a week or so. :)

[jimnyc]

We're going to have to send our special op's team in to cheer up Jimmy...

Not sure why, reminded me of "Flo" from the Progressive car insurance commercial, where she comes down the cable in the guys office (breaking in like Tom Cruises character in Mission Impossible, or the mouse in Trigg's avatar!)

[hjmick]

I'll tell you honestly, Jim, the only way I made it through the tough years, I mean really tough and I do mean years, the only way I made it, the only way our marriage survived is... I truly love this woman of mine. I don't understand all of it, most days I don't even remember the names of the two or three conditions that have been diagnosed, but I do know I love her and that's what got me through.


It got me through with my wife and her daughter... Who inherited pretty much the same stuff her mom has... That's right, I had two of them...

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

We're going to have to send our special op's team in to cheer up Jimmy...

http://www.kochman.dk/blog/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/swedish-bikini-team.jpg
Do they help cure the flu? I have had it since Tuesday and its quite wicked. I'd wish for a team of doctors like that but my wife would kill me!! ;)--Tyr

[jafar00]

I honestly don't think I could handle another type of diet or restriction in my life. LOL High cholesterol, out of shape, eat chicken, low calories, eat carbs, don't eat carbs, kill the bread, never drink soda.

I DO appreciate ya even bringing this up though, as truth be told, I had no idea that diet could have that kind of impact, so it gives me some research.

I don't see it as a diet or a restriction. Who doesn't like chowing down on a nicely cooked steak with a blue cheese sauce and a side of greens cooked in butter and tossed in the meat juices? You could even have bacon and eggs for breakfast safe in the knowledge that it is actually health food! :)

I made a permanent change because of the fact that I have lost weight and feel great. Do your research. I think there is something in it from what I've seen since I've been researching it myself.

[jimnyc]

I'll tell you honestly, Jim, the only way I made it through the tough years, I mean really tough and I do mean years, the only way I made it, the only way our marriage survived is... I truly love this woman of mine. I don't understand all of it, most days I don't even remember the names of the two or three conditions that have been diagnosed, but I do know I love her and that's what got me through.


It got me through with my wife and her daughter... Who inherited pretty much the same stuff her mom has... That's right, I had two of them...

My wife's mother has similar ailments to me, only when she was diagnosed they still called it "manic depression". Part of me thinks my wife would be more knowledgeable or sympathetic, but maybe she's jaded in growing up with a Mom who displayed symptoms. My Mom had it for sure and was on various medications, but I'm not sure who else in our family may have had ailments prior. Then I know I was diagnosed, as was my other brother, and now my son with Aspergers. They say that sometimes it skips a generation, but the odds of passing it on are very high.

[jimnyc]

I don't see it as a diet or a restriction. Who doesn't like chowing down on a nicely cooked steak with a blue cheese sauce and a side of greens cooked in butter and tossed in the meat juices? You could even have bacon and eggs for breakfast safe in the knowledge that it is actually health food! :)

I made a permanent change because of the fact that I have lost weight and feel great. Do your research. I think there is something in it from what I've seen since I've been researching it myself.

I was told once also about sugar crashes and such. No matter how much I try to diet, I end up finding myself watching a movie at night with some sort of crap in front of me. I try to limit it to fruits or other healthy goodies, and then I want something more fulfilling and switch to a healthy sandwich of sorts, and then the next thing you know there is a 4 foot long twinkie in front of me! :)

I would take an awesome steak and a healthy salad with bleu cheese 7 days a week. But it's sometimes easier to crack open a bag of chips than it is to prepare something.

Most of the time, thanks to my wife, I'll be eating healthy enough and normal sized portions. She picks out things ahead of time and one of us will cook nightly depending on availability. But it's always healthy stuff and correct proportions. If she's not around, it's a large pizza for me and the boy!

I think my issue is self control :)

[Voted4Reagan]

I was told once also about sugar crashes and such. No matter how much I try to diet, I end up finding myself watching a movie at night with some sort of crap in front of me. I try to limit it to fruits or other healthy goodies, and then I want something more fulfilling and switch to a healthy sandwich of sorts, and then the next thing you know there is a 4 foot long twinkie in front of me! :)

I would take an awesome steak and a healthy salad with bleu cheese 7 days a week. But it's sometimes easier to crack open a bag of chips than it is to prepare something.

Most of the time, thanks to my wife, I'll be eating healthy enough and normal sized portions. She picks out things ahead of time and one of us will cook nightly depending on availability. But it's always healthy stuff and correct proportions. If she's not around, it's a large pizza for me and the boy!

I think my issue is self control :)

Tell the wife to cook you a steak and to be happy she has a man to cook it for...

While you're doing that Jeff and I will notify your next of kin and the medics... lol

:lol::slap::lol:

[aboutime]

Jim. It's easy to blame your lack of determination, principles, and other excuses on what you call being TOO WEAK.

Not trying to be a smart ass here but. ONLY you can tell yourself what, and who you want to be.

How bout this?

If you continue with your excuses...which you have shared with all of us today.

You will suffer the consequences, much like I suffered the consequences of doing exactly as you claim YOU CANNOT CONTROL.

Namely. Eating too much crap. Smoking, Drinking, and not BEING HONEST WITH YOURSELF, then making excuses you use to explain WHY you can't stop yourself from that LONG SANDWICH.
That's all B.S.
I nearly died...TWICE, because I once made the very same kinds of excuses.
Two Heart Attacks later, and a doctor who told me..."LIGHT ONE MORE CIGARETTE...and you might die because your arteries are clogged".

I listened to him, and remembered MY GRAND CHILDREN, my son's, and my Wife...LOVE ME more than I needed another stupid smoke.

As an Alcoholic. I know, and recognize all of the EXCUSES you, and other people...including ME use to convince ourselves...all kinds of stupid things are OKAY.

Only YOU Jim. Only YOU...can prove...to yourself. You are either a strong man, or a weak Wuss.

[DragonStryk72]

True enough! My doctor stated as much during our last appointment when I explained to him that I was on a 'high period'. He was hesitant to counter it with a medication adjustment, as he as well believed there were benefits tied behind it, and that so long as it wasn't causing any issues.... Quite frankly, I'd like to be off of ALL the medications, and have stated as much to my doctor, but he said a certain balance was necessary. In other words, you're 100% correct, take the lows to get the high periods. I wouldn't forgo, I think it's worth it. But I do still have to take some medication, to keep the chemistry in line I suppose. I suppose I also have long term concerns about being on medications too, but how do you fight that anyway if the medicine is necessary?

Prize the doctor you have, and I wish my sister had had a similar doc who was restrained with medication, looking to see what she could manage instead of just writing another prescription. My sister wasn't as lucky. She had bi-polar as well, and went through something like 23 medications. The shear point that your doctor sees some benefits in the high periods as long as you can maintain your life speaks volumes.

If you want to see about getting off the meds eventually, then what you might look at is talking to your doc about lowering the dosage and observing how you handle the lessened meds.

The diet thing can work, but you have to be pretty rigid about it with bi-polar, and that's difficult simply because of being bi-polar. I don't think you guys understand really, what a depressive cycle is like with bi-polar. Jim could have been the sole winner of the $500 million dollar Powerball from a couple months ago, and he would still be depressed. Yeah, he'd be happy about the money and all, but he'd still be depressed. It might manifest as being worried about the taxes, or some other detail part of it, or seeing doom and gloom at the end, but that's really just how his brain focuses it.

That's the bitch of bi-polar disorder. There is no true impetus behind how you feel, whether it be the manic or depressive state. When you're manic, you're just manic, it's not like there's any decision point in it, you're just manic. You can keep it in mind, and force yourself to realize that you are viewing things in a skewed manner, such as Jim's training himself to do, but that's about it. Same for the depressive, in that he can focus on the point of knowing he's not seeing things as they really are emotionally, but it doesn't change the point that he's depressed.

[Voted4Reagan]

AboutTime = Lance Armstrong

Jimmy = Babe Ruth


http://youtu.be/YtO-6Xg3g2M

[Jeff]

Tell the wife to cook you a steak and to be happy she has a man to cook it for...

While you're doing that Jeff and I will notify your next of kin and the medics... lol

:lol::slap::lol:


Believe me when I am around Jim gets to cutting up just like what you are suggesting here and he is still kicking ( much to my surprise that is why I pump him up to talk that way in the first place :laugh: )

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

Believe me when I am around Jim gets to cutting up just like what you are suggesting here and he is still kicking ( much to my surprise that is why I pump him up to talk that way in the first place :laugh: ) I mess with my wife by saying stuff like that. She just laughs at me. Which makes me laugh even more. I tell her, "baby you know I am just a diamond in the rough".. She replies , "yeah jagged all over and in need of a few lumps to smooth you out!" :laugh: God, I love that woman, she can equal me on smartass quips any day! -Tyr

[aboutime]

AboutTime = Lance Armstrong

Jimmy = Babe Ruth


http://youtu.be/YtO-6Xg3g2M


Funny stuff. But....I also know. LANCE is still among the LIVING.:laugh: And, because I'm Sooooooo Old. Cannot stand RAP.

[Voted4Reagan]

Funny stuff. But....I also know. LANCE is still among the LIVING.:laugh: And, because I'm Sooooooo Old. Cannot stand RAP.

LOL... you are not that OLD.

But you can be pretty Salty at times

[jafar00]

I would take an awesome steak and a healthy salad with bleu cheese 7 days a week. But it's sometimes easier to crack open a bag of chips than it is to prepare something.


I got to the state where I would rather go "huntin'" in the freezer for the biggest steak and cook it to perfection. Cooking a natural, healthy meal, then chowing down on your creation is far more satisfying than a bag of potato chips. :)

[jlgray88]

i too know about mental illness. I suffer with extreme anxiety and have fought it for 15 years. Hang in there and keeps yours eyes on Jesus!!

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

I got to the state where I would rather go "huntin'" in the freezer for the biggest steak and cook it to perfection. Cooking a natural, healthy meal, then chowing down on your creation is far more satisfying than a bag of potato chips. :) I'd much rather go hunting to kill the steaks to cook for my family's meals. I guess I am not as lazy as some folks are. Of course haven't hunted lately but its not due to being too lazy to go. I'll be out in the woods this Spring Squirrel hunt. Gonna get some mighty fine meat to cook and prepare it with homemade biscuits and gravy. Damn great iffin' one knows how to cook it.. yum , yum. -Tyr

[Tyr-Ziu Saxnot]

i too know about mental illness. I suffer with extreme anxiety and have fought it for 15 years. Hang in there and keeps yours eyes on Jesus!! Say, don't they recommend treating that with a couple good shots of fine whiskey everyday except Sunday. ;) Ok , a bit of humor. I know its a serious affliction and all. Be cool. -Tyr

[Abbey Marie]

i too know about mental illness. I suffer with extreme anxiety and have fought it for 15 years. Hang in there and keeps yours eyes on Jesus!!

Welcome to the board, jlgray. Hope you stick around. :cool:

[jafar00]

I'd much rather go hunting to kill the steaks to cook for my family's meals. I guess I am not as lazy as some folks are. Of course haven't hunted lately but its not due to being too lazy to go. I'll be out in the woods this Spring Squirrel hunt. Gonna get some mighty fine meat to cook and prepare it with homemade biscuits and gravy. Damn great iffin' one knows how to cook it.. yum , yum. -Tyr

I've eaten some way out things in my time but not Squirrel. How's it taste?