!#$!#$ !$#!##$ coffee doesn't work!!

[Luna Tick]

Last night at Jake's Pub I had three fuzzy navels, 4 Heinekens, 5 Becks, 3 Mooseheads, 7 shots of tequila, a screwdriver, 3 martinis, 8 margaritas 4 wine coolers, half a bottle of vodka straight up, a strawberry daiquiri, 5 shots of whiskey, and a Shirley Temple.

I'm really good at holding my liquor, but I was really feeling it. I said to my friend, Sarah, "Thay, Thara ..." (drool, slurp) ... "I think I'm a little" ... (slobber, drool) "thlothed. I don't think I can" ... (drivel, slobber) ... "drive home." Okay, I couldn't even walk. When I tried to, I crashed right on top of a table where about 20 people were having some kind of birthday party meal. I apologized profusely and Sarah said she would help me sober up. She gave me what she said was the best coffee in the world, this Kenya Kirinyaga Kii Peaberry Espresso. I drank cup after cup, but I didn't sober up one bit. I just had to piss. Then she had to carry me to the little girl's room and put me on the toilet.

Why didn't the coffee work? This is depressing me. I need a drink.

[chloe]

Last night at Jake's Pub I had three fuzzy navels, 4 Heinekens, 5 Becks, 3 Mooseheads, 7 shots of tequila, a screwdriver, 3 martinis, 8 margaritas 4 wine coolers, half a bottle of vodka straight up, a strawberry daiquiri, 5 shots of whiskey, and a Shirley Temple.

I'm really good at holding my liquor, but I was really feeling it. I said to my friend, Sarah, "Thay, Thara ..." (drool, slurp) ... "I think I'm a little" ... (slobber, drool) "thlothed. I don't think I can" ... (drivel, slobber) ... "drive home." Okay, I couldn't even walk. When I tried to, I crashed right on top of a table where about 20 people were having some kind of birthday party meal. I apologized profusely and Sarah said she would help me sober up. She gave me what she said was the best coffee in the world, this Kenya Kirinyaga Kii Peaberry Espresso. I drank cup after cup, but I didn't sober up one bit. I just had to piss. Then she had to carry me to the little girl's room and put me on the toilet.

Why didn't the coffee work? This is depressing me. I need a drink.

You big stinken drunk ! How's that fat 14 pound baby of yours I hope not suffering from your reckless drinking during pregnancy.:rolleyes:

Oh that Kenyan coffee is laced with cocaine thats prolly why you didnt sober up but pissed alot.......

[Luna Tick]

Damn it, I didn't want to do any cocaine. I'm totally against that shit. Who do they think I am, some kind of drug addict.

The baby's fine, but I'm still getting over the birth. I got talked into giving natural birth at home with a midwife. I screamed so loud that I shattered the sliding glass door.

[chloe]

Damn it, I didn't want to do any cocaine. I'm totally against that shit. Who do they think I am, some kind of drug addict.

The baby's fine, but I'm still getting over the birth. I got talked into giving natural birth at home with a midwife. I screamed so loud that I shattered the sliding glass door.

yeah you need cosmetic surgery after that 14 pounder at least a labiaplasty.......you can prolly earn the money from your new job in a day.

all right Im outta here.....adios amigo!

[logroller]

Last night at Jake's Pub I had three fuzzy navels, 4 Heinekens, 5 Becks, 3 Mooseheads, 7 shots of tequila, a screwdriver, 3 martinis, 8 margaritas 4 wine coolers, half a bottle of vodka straight up, a strawberry daiquiri, 5 shots of whiskey, and a Shirley Temple.

I'm really good at holding my liquor, but I was really feeling it. I said to my friend, Sarah, "Thay, Thara ..." (drool, slurp) ... "I think I'm a little" ... (slobber, drool) "thlothed. I don't think I can" ... (drivel, slobber) ... "drive home." Okay, I couldn't even walk. When I tried to, I crashed right on top of a table where about 20 people were having some kind of birthday party meal. I apologized profusely and Sarah said she would help me sober up. She gave me what she said was the best coffee in the world, this Kenya Kirinyaga Kii Peaberry Espresso. I drank cup after cup, but I didn't sober up one bit. I just had to piss. Then she had to carry me to the little girl's room and put me on the toilet.

Why didn't the coffee work? This is depressing me. I need a drink.

I let it slide that night because it was nice, for once, to not be the drunkest one on my birthday! You were hammered, (and I'll explain why coming up); there weren't even 20 people at my party; just me, Lemon and JT drinking malt liquor and playing trivial pursuit Bible edition. You're welcome for the shirley temple BTW; sorry bout the rufie. JT had a huge lead in the game and Lemon was looking for an advantage and thought your drink was JT's. Innocent mistake, you know that happens.