Still trying to wrap my head around this...

[KitchenKitten99]

My grandmother was going through their papers and documents and found all the court documents regarding the custody hearings between my mom and dad, and the fighting that went down between them. She sent them to me, knowing I would like to see them.

For those who don't know, my mom had me at 16, and never married my dad and they tried to stay together but ending up splitting up when I was about 3 or so. My dad's mom ended up with custody (i am finally reading how this came about). She raised me until she passed away when I was 15.

When I was about 17, it was finally revealed to me that the dad I knew as my dad, was in fact not my biological father. She didn't tell me who my father really was, and for the last 10 years, I had been unsure how to ask. I tried over the last 2 years or so, but she has avoided telling me saying she can't remember his name, saying he wanted nothing to do with me or her so why pursue it, or using some other distracting tactic, etc. Not fully believing her, I just resigned myself to never knowing his identity.

I also know that both my dad and mom, as well as grandparents on both sides, all have given me different stories about how I came to live with my dad's mother, and I am sure plenty of lies/exaggerations about each other, including in the court documents. Sad but it's the only certain truth.

Going through the documents, I see a name on the paperwork that my mother mentioned to the court who she presumed to be my biological father.

I am going to ask for your help in this. The name is listed as Ronald Wreath. Now assuming that this name wasn't made up, I would appreciate help in locating him. I searched the internet with nothing more than a handful of addresses of men with that name throughout the country.

Details to note:
He had to live in Minnesota in the very least December 1979, as I was born September 1980.
Approximate age would most likely be mid-late 40's. My mother will be 46 this year. So he will likely be close to that age, probably a year or two older, maybe more.
My mother lived in the city of New Brighton with her mother and siblings around that time, in an apartment building. I was told by my grandmother that he lived across the hallway (she didn't know his name).

If anyone has any info that is useful to me, please PM me.

I have no intention of interrupting his life if he does not desire my presence. I just want to have closure as well as health information to help diagnose what health issues I have and maybe treat them better if genetics might be/are a factor.
My mother's name was Brenda L. Larson

[Mr. P]

http://www.zabasearch.com/

Try it there's a Ronald Wreath in St. Paul. More around the country with birth yrs noted.

[KitchenKitten99]

I just wanted to let you all know that this post has had divine intervention. My biological father only just over the weekend, decided to google his name, and this post came up. He signed up for an account here so he could PM me. We have since been communicating and all is going well!

He states he was never told by my mother that she was pregnant. His sister did say something, but he said his sister liked to lie and stir up trouble so he didn't believe her.

His family only lived in the apartments until they found a house, so they moved and my mom never heard from him after.

I have found my lost family! They are all friending me on facebook and I am getting emails and all sorts of communication from the extended family on his side, wanting to know me and know more about me.

He still has family up here (he lives in TX) and actually has been planning to come up to help settle estate issues of his great grandfather who passed away recently.

Yes, we will get a paternity test. However looking at photos of me, and also of him...I look just like him.

I have spoken with my mother on all this and she still is adamant that she told him about me. I wish I could believe her because I just don't get that feeling from him that he's not being honest, and she's lied to me my whole life about stuff she doesn't even need to.

Anyhow, I just thought I would share this.

If anyone wants to know more details, feel free to ask here or PM.

[Abbey Marie]

Wow!

[revelarts]

thats too cool. great!

[PostmodernProphet]

hope all goes well for you in this....

[crin63]

What an amazing story and turn of events for you. Here's hoping it all works out for you, but even if by chance he turns out not to be your dad it seems you have made friends that you would not otherwise have. Thats a pretty good thing.

Make sure you write this all down and pass it along to your children someday.

[Abbey Marie]

Another service brought to you by DP. :salute: :beer:

[KitchenKitten99]

Update: My dad, his wife, and his brother will be arriving from Texas in the late evening sometime 6/30! They are driving up (flying is too much$ right now) and will be staying with us over the weekend. This will be my/our first meeting!

[Mr. P]

Update: My dad, his wife, and his brother will be arriving from Texas in the late evening sometime 6/30! They are driving up (flying is too much$ right now) and will be staying with us over the weekend. This will be my/our first meeting!

That's great!!! I'll bet yer exited and scared.

[Binky]

That's a great story. Tread softly. Remember, these are strangers. Take caution.....

And have fun getting to know them.....

[KitchenKitten99]

That's a great story. Tread softly. Remember, these are strangers. Take caution.....

And have fun getting to know them.....

Well, they are and they aren't.

There is another twist to the story that my dad and I actually have a mutual friend, that we didn't realize we had. They know him really well and can vouch he's a good guy. I really can't explain it here because that would mean a whole other backstory I would rather not get into publicly. If you want details, PM me.

[KitchenKitten99]

About 28 hours to go...

[Kathianne]

About 28 hours to go...

Here's hoping all is as you wish! :cheers2:

[Said1]

I just wanted to let you all know that this post has had divine intervention. My biological father only just over the weekend, decided to google his name, and this post came up. He signed up for an account here so he could PM me. We have since been communicating and all is going well!

He states he was never told by my mother that she was pregnant. His sister did say something, but he said his sister liked to lie and stir up trouble so he didn't believe her.

His family only lived in the apartments until they found a house, so they moved and my mom never heard from him after.

I have found my lost family! They are all friending me on facebook and I am getting emails and all sorts of communication from the extended family on his side, wanting to know me and know more about me.

He still has family up here (he lives in TX) and actually has been planning to come up to help settle estate issues of his great grandfather who passed away recently.

Yes, we will get a paternity test. However looking at photos of me, and also of him...I look just like him.

I have spoken with my mother on all this and she still is adamant that she told him about me. I wish I could believe her because I just don't get that feeling from him that he's not being honest, and she's lied to me my whole life about stuff she doesn't even need to.

Anyhow, I just thought I would share this.

If anyone wants to know more details, feel free to ask here or PM.

OMG. that is truly one of the most amazing stories I've ever heard!

[KitchenKitten99]

Dad & crew are on their way back to Texas. The week/weekend was fun! Went to tour the area where my dad & uncle grew up, met some of my relatives that still live here, and was able to really bond with dad! We both cried last night because neither of us wanted him to leave.

However there is some good news on top of all of it... They are planning to move to Tulsa (where my step-mom is from) to take care of her mom whose health is failing. Once her mom passes on, he wants to move back here to Minnesota! He never wants to leave again and said had he known about me, he would never have left.

So we will have to wait a while, but probably in a year or so, he will be back and never leave!

I miss him so much already... it is hard sitting in class and thinking about the fact I probably won't be able to see him again until the fall, when we are planning to go down there to visit.

[HogTrash]

It was meant to be, FuzzyKitten. :clap:

[jimnyc]

Holy crap! I didn't even know about this thread till just now as it was linked from another thread. Fuzzy, that is awesome!! The internet is just one HUGE archived phone book now which allows for such things to happen. I can't imagine how awesome this must be for you, even if you had found him through a paid service - but even more miraculous when we find out he found YOU via a search which brought him here. Good thing the PM option was functioning that day!

I know this and my prior board started a few real life friendships, MANY online friendships & now an unlikely family reunion.

[KitchenKitten99]

Holy crap! I didn't even know about this thread till just now as it was linked from another thread. Fuzzy, that is awesome!! The internet is just one HUGE archived phone book now which allows for such things to happen. I can't imagine how awesome this must be for you, even if you had found him through a paid service - but even more miraculous when we find out he found YOU via a search which brought him here. Good thing the PM option was functioning that day!

I know this and my prior board started a few real life friendships, MANY online friendships & now an unlikely family reunion.

I have my profile set to send me an email with the text of my PM's from here in the email so I don't have to log in to read them right away.

I got the PM and pulled the email up on my Blackberry while I was at a stoplight, only 2 blocks from home. I think I must have sat at that light forever reading the email over and over, not believing what I was reading, then when the light turned green I think that was the hardest I have ever slammed on the gas in my car to get to the next light to turn into my street. I get home and immediately log into my computer (of course it seems like it is taking forever to boot up, etc), and read over and over, numb with all sorts of emotions.

I email him back and it took off from there.

[Kathianne]

There seems to be a screenplay here. :smoke: This is an amazing story! I'm so happy for you Fuzzykitten.

[KitchenKitten99]

There seems to be a screenplay here. :smoke: This is an amazing story! I'm so happy for you Fuzzykitten.

You have no idea, lol.

There is even more to this as I learn of my lineage (too much detail and almost too crazy to even talk about), however no one would believe it to be real life if I did tell them more than I have written here-I sometimes have a hard time believing it myself. I actually have thought about writing it all down and turning into a book or movie.