mommie went to heaven

[stephanie]

my mom decided she'd had enough and went and joined my sis in heaven this morning at 3:30. of course she picked a time when no one would be there to see it or be with her...I am sad but yet not..she wouldn't of wanted to live the way she was and she told me she was tired of it all..
She was a strong, stubborn, opinionated woman who had a hard life, but she was a funny lady who loved to laugh..and I for some reason never failed to make her laugh, she would just shake her head and tell me I was crazy..

now my mom will raise hell in heaven, I hope they are ready..
goodbye mom, I loved you...:cheers2:

[jimnyc]

Steph, you have my sincerest condolences. My thoughts are with both you and the rest of your family.

[Abbey Marie]

Steph, I am so sorry. I'm glad she got to do it on her terms, though. If you want to talk, I went through the same thing.

[stephanie]

Steph, I am so sorry. I'm glad she got to do it on her terms, though. If you want to talk, I went through the same thing.

thank you Abbey..
I guess knowing it was coming makes it somewhat easier and seeing her with dementia and reliant on others for everything she needed, I knew she wouldn't want to continue on and live this way..She would of been 86 next month, so she lived a long life...so yes I am sad, but yet grateful that she will be able to once again raise hell as the vibrant person she was in heaven..

thanks again dear..

[avatar4321]

Im sorry to hear about your loss. Your family is in my prayers.

[emmett]

There are no words to console the heart when "mom" dies. It is a most unfamiliar and lonely feeling when mom is gone. Like all wounds it does heel and when the when the emotional wound is healed on the outside comes the rest of your life when the many lessons and knowledge acquired from her continues to stay with you. I think often of my mom and there is no pain, only a fond memory of love and dedication that I try to pass on in a manner that I hope would make her proud of me.

When we cry for our loss, we cry for ourselves and that sense of loss we feel. Your mom has no pain and is free of all burdens. You are a good person Steph and I'm sure your mom knew that. God Bless you and yours in this time.

[crin63]

Although you were prepared for this, the heart still breaks with the loss and aches with the longing to see them. I lost my grandpa a couple years ago and he was one the most important people in my life. I start to call him every once in a while and then remember he is gone.

I'm sorry for your loss.

[stephanie]

There are no words to console the heart when "mom" dies. It is a most unfamiliar and lonely feeling when mom is gone. Like all wounds it does heel and when the when the emotional wound is healed on the outside comes the rest of your life when the many lessons and knowledge acquired from her continues to stay with you. I think often of my mom and there is no pain, only a fond memory of love and dedication that I try to pass on in a manner that I hope would make her proud of me.

When we cry for our loss, we cry for ourselves and that sense of loss we feel. Your mom has no pain and is free of all burdens. You are a good person Steph and I'm sure your mom knew that. God Bless you and yours in this time.

Wow, that was touching dear..thank you and all here...
It will be weird when on Mothers day I want to buy a goofy card to send her, (she knew I didn't like all that mushy stuff, and I wanted to make her laugh), and to know she is not here to send it to...But, she knew I loved her and even up to the very end while she was having a lucid time, I still made her laugh..That moment will be burned in my heart because I knew time was short and I took pride in making her laugh...

[PostmodernProphet]

/pulls up a chair to sit with you a while....

[stephanie]

/pulls up a chair to sit with you a while....

now that almost made me cry dangit...and I accept..

[Mr. P]

/pulls up a chair to sit with you a while....

I'd like to sit along side if that's OK.

[stephanie]

I'd like to sit along side if that's OK.

the more the merrier..I'll bring the champagne and we can make a toast to my dear mom..:cheers2:

[Mr. P]

the more the merrier..I'll bring the champagne and we can make a toast to my dear mom..:cheers2:

Indeed we shall!! :cheers2:

[stephanie]

As I said, she had a hard life and had a hard time saying " I love you or hugging others". she also had eight kids by two different marriages and half the kids went with their dad and was told things about my mom that made them not ever get in any sort of contact with her..I know that had to hurt her deeply..The third marriage was to my stepfather in which I was raised, he was a acholic who attacked and always tried to choke my mom constantly, and when I was old enough, I would jump on his back and beat the shit out of his head...I guess that is why I grew up to become this tough old broad who will never take any shit from anyone..:laugh2:

but back to the story...because she had a hard time showing affection, I knew deep down she loved me, but when younger I sometimes wondered..

the day I knew she loved me unconditionally, was when I was a drugged out sixteen yr. old who got pregnant..I knew I wasn't in any condition to take care of a baby, and I spoke to my mom that I wonder if I should give it up for adoption so it would have a better life..well, on the second time I said this, my mom looked at me and said, don't you ever think that again..she said she would take care of the baby and even if I still needed to go off and sow my oats and grow up, no matter how long it took, I could then come and take the baby back..And that is just what happened...I came and went in and out of my babies life, as it took me about two more yrs. to somewhat grow up and I met a man who was not a fuck-up, who took my child on as his own.. Unfortunatly, that wonderful man and I didn't make it, but I still have my wonderful hunky 37 yr. old son, all thanks to my mom..
That was the day that I never doubted my mom loved me again and I always loved her more and had deep respect for her..

just thought I would share:beer:

[PostmodernProphet]

that's a lot of mom....

Without You

Mom, without you, there would be no me.
Your love, your attention, your guidance,
have made me who I am.
Without you, I would be lost,
wandering aimlessly,
without direction or purpose.
You showed me the way
to serve, to accomplish, to persevere.
Without you, there would be an empty space
I could never fill, no matter how I tried.
Instead, because of you,
I have joy, contentment, satisfaction and peace.
Thank you, mom.
I have always loved you
and I always will.

By Joanna Fuchs

[actsnoblemartin]

steph, god bless you and your family

my condolences to you and your family


my mom decided she'd had enough and went and joined my sis in heaven this morning at 3:30. of course she picked a time when no one would be there to see it or be with her...I am sad but yet not..she wouldn't of wanted to live the way she was and she told me she was tired of it all..
She was a strong, stubborn, opinionated woman who had a hard life, but she was a funny lady who loved to laugh..and I for some reason never failed to make her laugh, she would just shake her head and tell me I was crazy..

now my mom will raise hell in heaven, I hope they are ready..
goodbye mom, I loved you...:cheers2:

[Kathianne]

Stephanie, my prayers are with you-your mom doesn't need them anymore. That she was strong is evidenced by you. May God console you when you need it. Keep up the good thoughts.

[jackass]

Steph, so sorry to hear it. I lost both my parents when they were very young (in their early 50's) and I miss them both so much at times. If you need to talk, I am here.

[stephanie]

thank you to all..I knew I could share this news here and get lots of support and care.

right now I seem to be O.K. maybe it hasn't sunk in yet..the burial won't be till next Wednesday in Springfield, IL and I am back home here in Missouri.
then it might smack me up side of the head.

I do appreciate all the thoughts and offers of talking...

[Jeff]

Sorry to hear the news, my thoughts and prayers are with you and yours