stephanie
03-13-2007, 07:29 PM
Very Funny......::laugh2:
By JAMES LILEKS
c.2007 Newhouse News Service
In these dark days when freedom of speech is curtailed at every turn, it's comforting to see debate stifled for the right reasons. Yes, a blow for truth has been struck: The Democrats, bowing to the wishes of their online constituents, have withdrawn from a presidential candidate debate sponsored by Fox News, aka Satan's Blowhole.
Disaster averted! After all, the Dems were having nightmares in which:
— The panel of questioners was replaced at the very last second by the entire Swift Boat brigade.
— The doors swung shut and gas billowed from hidden vents, making Goldfinger's fiendish plot horribly apparent to all.
— Ann Coulter dropped down from the catwalk and choked John Edwards with her legs.
— The Spanish-language feed was devilishly altered to give all candidates a Frito Bandito accent.
— Edwards' hair was subtly altered to appear less shiny, manageable.
— People who never watched Fox News were surprised when the break produced a commercial instead of a picture of George W. Bush accompanied by the "Hallelujah Chorus.''
But of course the folks at Fox News would have been on their best behavior. They'd have pretended to be a news-gathering outfit, when we all know what they really are: a dumbed-down hogwash hootenanny, a network for two-tooth trailer trash who just don't know what to think, gawrsh darnit, until Greta Van Susteren puts them under a hypnotic spell and refreshes the jingoist dictums implanted earlier by Rush Limbaugh. Right? Or rather, correct? (Equating "right'' with "correct'' — that's just the sort of thing they do on Fox News!)
Anti-Fox forces always cite the same old story: According to polls, 99 percent of Fox News watchers believe Saddam flew a jet into the World Trade Center, or something like that.
Of course we know Saddam had no terrorist ties, no WMDs — he dispatched the Kurds using only the power of suggestion — and he threated no one.
And when Dick Cheney decided to boost Halliburton profits by invading Iraq to pay for the third-world babies he likes to boil for lunch, he used the awesome power of Bill O'Reilly's 90-second editorials to force Hillary Clinton to vote for the war. Simple as that.
Or so the Fox foes seem dearly to believe. Ergo, they cheer this punch in Fox's florid nose.
It reminds us that there are not two sides to every issue. There's Left, and there's Wrong. There is The Truth as put forward by the utterly disinterested and Olympian media, a shining white alabaster column topped by a statue of Keith Olbermann. And then there are the conservatives, the gibbering homunculi capering at its base, howling out their peculiar objections. There's no reason they should be included in polite debate. (Oh, and hurrah for diversity.)
As debate foe and MoveOn.org organizer Adam Green said, "We hope the result is that Fox is permanently chilled within Democratic circles from being considered a neutral news source worth legitimizing.''
It truly makes one long for the old days, when Walter Cronkite stored his personal opinions in a black box at the front desk before he went to work.
Will conservative activists forbid any Republican candidate to appear on CBS or NPR or any event in which The New York Times is involved? Some might, but most will take a grown-up approach: You talk to everyone, try to get the message out, and let people figure out for themselves what to think. After all, the job of president often includes taking questions from people and organizations not inclined to share your particular viewpoint.
Maybe the Democrats should view Fox News as practice for dealing with lesser threats to peace and justice, like Iran or Russia. Heck, if you can take a question about health care from a neocon lunatic like Juan Williams or Geraldo, you can certainly stare down Putin.
In the short run, though, expect retaliation. Leave it to the White House to use this an excuse to change the rules of the press briefings, and only call on Helen Thomas every other day.
(James Lileks can be contacted at newhouse(at)lileks.com)
http://www.newhouse.com/lileks-sometimes-debate-must-be-sacrificed-to-the-truth.html
By JAMES LILEKS
c.2007 Newhouse News Service
In these dark days when freedom of speech is curtailed at every turn, it's comforting to see debate stifled for the right reasons. Yes, a blow for truth has been struck: The Democrats, bowing to the wishes of their online constituents, have withdrawn from a presidential candidate debate sponsored by Fox News, aka Satan's Blowhole.
Disaster averted! After all, the Dems were having nightmares in which:
— The panel of questioners was replaced at the very last second by the entire Swift Boat brigade.
— The doors swung shut and gas billowed from hidden vents, making Goldfinger's fiendish plot horribly apparent to all.
— Ann Coulter dropped down from the catwalk and choked John Edwards with her legs.
— The Spanish-language feed was devilishly altered to give all candidates a Frito Bandito accent.
— Edwards' hair was subtly altered to appear less shiny, manageable.
— People who never watched Fox News were surprised when the break produced a commercial instead of a picture of George W. Bush accompanied by the "Hallelujah Chorus.''
But of course the folks at Fox News would have been on their best behavior. They'd have pretended to be a news-gathering outfit, when we all know what they really are: a dumbed-down hogwash hootenanny, a network for two-tooth trailer trash who just don't know what to think, gawrsh darnit, until Greta Van Susteren puts them under a hypnotic spell and refreshes the jingoist dictums implanted earlier by Rush Limbaugh. Right? Or rather, correct? (Equating "right'' with "correct'' — that's just the sort of thing they do on Fox News!)
Anti-Fox forces always cite the same old story: According to polls, 99 percent of Fox News watchers believe Saddam flew a jet into the World Trade Center, or something like that.
Of course we know Saddam had no terrorist ties, no WMDs — he dispatched the Kurds using only the power of suggestion — and he threated no one.
And when Dick Cheney decided to boost Halliburton profits by invading Iraq to pay for the third-world babies he likes to boil for lunch, he used the awesome power of Bill O'Reilly's 90-second editorials to force Hillary Clinton to vote for the war. Simple as that.
Or so the Fox foes seem dearly to believe. Ergo, they cheer this punch in Fox's florid nose.
It reminds us that there are not two sides to every issue. There's Left, and there's Wrong. There is The Truth as put forward by the utterly disinterested and Olympian media, a shining white alabaster column topped by a statue of Keith Olbermann. And then there are the conservatives, the gibbering homunculi capering at its base, howling out their peculiar objections. There's no reason they should be included in polite debate. (Oh, and hurrah for diversity.)
As debate foe and MoveOn.org organizer Adam Green said, "We hope the result is that Fox is permanently chilled within Democratic circles from being considered a neutral news source worth legitimizing.''
It truly makes one long for the old days, when Walter Cronkite stored his personal opinions in a black box at the front desk before he went to work.
Will conservative activists forbid any Republican candidate to appear on CBS or NPR or any event in which The New York Times is involved? Some might, but most will take a grown-up approach: You talk to everyone, try to get the message out, and let people figure out for themselves what to think. After all, the job of president often includes taking questions from people and organizations not inclined to share your particular viewpoint.
Maybe the Democrats should view Fox News as practice for dealing with lesser threats to peace and justice, like Iran or Russia. Heck, if you can take a question about health care from a neocon lunatic like Juan Williams or Geraldo, you can certainly stare down Putin.
In the short run, though, expect retaliation. Leave it to the White House to use this an excuse to change the rules of the press briefings, and only call on Helen Thomas every other day.
(James Lileks can be contacted at newhouse(at)lileks.com)
http://www.newhouse.com/lileks-sometimes-debate-must-be-sacrificed-to-the-truth.html