The Bare Knuckled Pundit
05-30-2008, 02:14 PM
In the tradition of the legendary 1963 March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom and the momentous Million Man March of 1995, dozens of devout Hillary Clinton supporters will hold Hillary’s Hundred Hussy Hullabaloo Saturday.
A resounding and cacophonous whine is expected to echo throughout the nation’s capital as taxi loads of Clinton supporters brazenly protest at a meeting of the Democratic National Committee’s Rules and Bylaws Committee. Falling on the same day as the anti-climatic Puerto Rican primary, the committee will take up the fate of the delegates from the pariah states of Florida and Michigan.
Expected to draw dozens of frustrated Floridians and maddened Michiganders, the protest may well be a fittingly symbolic capstone to Clinton’s futile efforts to collect the currently banned delegates. The great irony in the decision to move the two major primaries is the fact that had they been held when originally scheduled their importance and influence would have been greatly magnified. Moreover, they may well have provided Clinton with enough momentum and fundraising fuel to ultimately dispatch the upstart Barrack Obama and seize the Democratic presidential nomination.
While the Obama campaign has signaled its willingness to compromise on the ultimate number of delegates seated, Hillary has held fast in true Divorce Court fashion to her insistence that all votes be counted and all delegates seated from the two critical states. Even were this to occur, the improbably astronomical odds against Hillary gaining the nomination are compounded by her need for a seismic shift in the endorsement trend among superdelegates.
Adding to the unlikelihood of this happening is fear among the DNC and superdelegates of irreparable damage to the party. Should it appear that the nomination was in effect stolen from the first black candidate with a legitimate shot at winning the presidency, party insiders despair of the potential electoral backlash. Dreading not only a loss this coming November, there are deep seeded concerns over black abandonment of the party in the longer term.
At this point reports indicate the DNC may seat half of the delegates in limbo. While allowing Hillary to cut into Obama’s lead this would be a pyrrhic victory as the nomination would still be mathematically beyond her grasp.
In addition to waving the banner of their electorally star-crossed matron, the Hillary Hundred will be holding a bake sale and cash Cosmopolitan bar in conjunction with their efforts to payoff Clinton’s monumental campaign debt. Currently estimated at over $20 million with $10 million in loans from the candidate herself, organizers are hoping for a wave of Cosmopolitan-fueled munchies to fill up the campaign coffers. In light of the considerable size of the debt, perhaps they should be praying for a tsunami instead.
Stock up on the brownies and Stoli’s, faithful readers! Stay tuned for further updates as the vodka flows and the cookies go.
A resounding and cacophonous whine is expected to echo throughout the nation’s capital as taxi loads of Clinton supporters brazenly protest at a meeting of the Democratic National Committee’s Rules and Bylaws Committee. Falling on the same day as the anti-climatic Puerto Rican primary, the committee will take up the fate of the delegates from the pariah states of Florida and Michigan.
Expected to draw dozens of frustrated Floridians and maddened Michiganders, the protest may well be a fittingly symbolic capstone to Clinton’s futile efforts to collect the currently banned delegates. The great irony in the decision to move the two major primaries is the fact that had they been held when originally scheduled their importance and influence would have been greatly magnified. Moreover, they may well have provided Clinton with enough momentum and fundraising fuel to ultimately dispatch the upstart Barrack Obama and seize the Democratic presidential nomination.
While the Obama campaign has signaled its willingness to compromise on the ultimate number of delegates seated, Hillary has held fast in true Divorce Court fashion to her insistence that all votes be counted and all delegates seated from the two critical states. Even were this to occur, the improbably astronomical odds against Hillary gaining the nomination are compounded by her need for a seismic shift in the endorsement trend among superdelegates.
Adding to the unlikelihood of this happening is fear among the DNC and superdelegates of irreparable damage to the party. Should it appear that the nomination was in effect stolen from the first black candidate with a legitimate shot at winning the presidency, party insiders despair of the potential electoral backlash. Dreading not only a loss this coming November, there are deep seeded concerns over black abandonment of the party in the longer term.
At this point reports indicate the DNC may seat half of the delegates in limbo. While allowing Hillary to cut into Obama’s lead this would be a pyrrhic victory as the nomination would still be mathematically beyond her grasp.
In addition to waving the banner of their electorally star-crossed matron, the Hillary Hundred will be holding a bake sale and cash Cosmopolitan bar in conjunction with their efforts to payoff Clinton’s monumental campaign debt. Currently estimated at over $20 million with $10 million in loans from the candidate herself, organizers are hoping for a wave of Cosmopolitan-fueled munchies to fill up the campaign coffers. In light of the considerable size of the debt, perhaps they should be praying for a tsunami instead.
Stock up on the brownies and Stoli’s, faithful readers! Stay tuned for further updates as the vodka flows and the cookies go.